HUMOROUSLY YOURS
Heavy New Year
The legendary ball drops at New York City’s Time Square, the Sydney Opera House is all lit up from fireworks as are the Eiffel Tower and many other landmarks around the world, not to mention the countless non-descript ones.
The smog was the limit
Everyone knows you are the sharpest officer, but be prepared to put “Maj. (Retd.)” before your name once you hang up your uniform for good. Ok, maybe not. Since you stand out so much from the rest, you’ll advance further, to the rank of Lt. Col., tops. Ok? Now go, finish up your staff college and be happy with “PSC” at the end of your name and stop dreaming of adding an NDC (National Defense College) on your business card.
Have None, Will Travel
You want to now pack me up and send me to Timbuktu?” yells Dennis Palmer, sitting at the head of the table in the meeting room.
HUMOROUSLY YOURS / Every breath you take
Neither Pink Floyd nor the Pink Panther had anything to do with Bangladesh’s pink wash, but the good thing is that Bangladesh at least didn’t let India play for a good two days during the first test. In fact, the runs of our boys in the first innings were 0,1,8,1,6,0,0,0,4, which together was perhaps a cryptic message to Robi to once again pick up the team sponsorship.
To Cut or Not to Cut
When a cyclone is named Bulbul, chances are people, at least in Bangladesh, won’t take it seriously. And we are Bangladeshis—what freaks us out is not a number 9 signal, but the lowest number
Indecent Proposal
A bit more about “special” rooms from my column a few weeks ago, when Bangladesh University of Engineering and Technology (Buet) was in the news for the wrong reasons. It’s room 429, Nazrul Islam Hall.
The last and the ludicrous
Hats off to the Ministry of Public Administration for taking the bold step of introducing paternity leave. Better be clear though about the cap on the number of such leaves, else we will have a population explosion 2.0.
Gold Finger
You have a son and you worry about that boy. You have a daughter and you have to worry about every boy on the block, because not every parent is worrying about his/her boy.
Who is Daddy's Girl?
Let's face it, if there is anyone we love the most, it's ourselves. It is probably the biggest waste of human cells to have a pair of ears –
United we stand, overbooked we fall
My show hosts in Dallas, Texas treat me to a sumptuous biryani dinner. Being a wise man with an early morning flight the following
Big Sister is watching you
I have to admit that after all these years of marriage, I still haven't given my wife the legendary football sized, ok, cricket ball sized, ok, ping pong ball sized, ok, marble sized, ok, pellet sized diamond ring.
Inverse to distance
There will be so much winning that all will get tired of winning and beg, “Stop! We can't take this [the winning] anymore.” The heads will spin.
Lapbottom
Biman, capitalise on it! “Fly directly to London, do not pass [through] the Middle East, do not collect a baggage tag for your laptop.”
The Lateral Samaritans
Being a compassionate husband, I give my wife company during all her cravings throughout her pregnancy. As a result, both of us are competing when it comes to the size of our bellies. We almost get a buy-one-get-one-free ultra sonogram deal.
Handsome in Pink
Saturday. The wife is 400 miles away attending her MBA classes at University of California Berkeley. I am at the Torrey Pines Beach in San Diego, California.
The ever obliging hostages
The hiring manager at Takata Inc. in Farmington Hills, Michigan tells me, “We have seen tons of engineers, but none who has been in a Pepsi TV commercial.”
Guilty until proven innocent
Though I insist on his giving me the full address and directions to his home, he says with confidence, “Come to the Bakshi Bazaar