Satireday
Satire / BBA student gets married, calls it the best networking experience of his life
Nothing is impossible – if you believe in your ability to make the right connections, that is.
Satire / iPhone 16 users claim biggest feature is a scam
The iPhone 16 series launched a couple of weeks ago, coinciding with a sudden rise in online ads by people selling human kidneys.
Government losing ‘Aandar’ control trying to bring it under control
In an unprecedented twist, the government keeps losing Aandar control while attempting to bring it under control. Aanda, or egg -- whatever people choose to call it doesn’t matter anymore as they are having breakfast without eggs.
Holy League unveils new leftist wing
“We represent the thoughts, feelings and experiences of the majority of Bangladesh. Our policies, philosophies and ideals are all BLESSED. You must understand this,” he yelled at the crowd.
A tale from the future: Ordinary students celebrate lynching 100th person
The year is 2028. Ordinary students have done something extraordinary yet again. Yesterday, they organised “Lunch for Lynching” to celebrate beating a hundred people to death since the “lucky seventh independence”.
Satire / ‘Natok Kom Koro Pio’
“Natok kom koro Pio,” the man said, his white beard shaking with fury.
Altruistic prisoners demand work-from-jail permission
When the world is busy inventing and discovering new things, the people of Chapasthan 2.0 are busy coming up with new demands with every passing hour.
Satire / Nation struggles with newfound freedom of speech
Who would have thought? From the yoke of authoritarianism, where everything you said had to be checked for the presence of words that could anger the powers that be, today, Bangladeshis can say whatever they want to.
Obsessed with rainbows, ex-faculty member slapped with restraining order
When the former part-time lecturer of Crack University was let go last year for his discriminatory language and actions, he was at a loss. Why had the university dismissed him for tearing up a book as an educator?
The Cancelling
The TV hummed slowly, filling the room with a soothing sound. Almost acting like a form of white noise.
Tyrant wakes up after 15 years, becomes good person
A tyrant who was on a drip of liquefied sleeping pills for the last 15 years because another tyrant had usurped him, woke up on August 7 and became a good person.
Anti-social enterprise issues half-baked apology for refusing Gaur a job at dairy farm
Pillage a Village, one of the country’s largest dairy farms, yesterday expressed regret over the “unfortunate” experience of a Gaur who was refused a job at their dairy farm, over what the Gaur claimed was “blatant speciesism.”
Government employees donate 25% of salary for city’s decorations
Red lights. Green light. Then blue lights. And some yellow lights. It doesn’t matter when the colours stop representing what they are meant to because we don’t have enough of those colours.
Employee who was asked to pull up socks, can’t afford socks
A Dhoka employee who was asked to pull up his socks and improve his performance at work yesterday informed his office that he could not even afford socks.
Country’s image more fragile than male ego? One country finally opens up
Osama Rahman [OR]: We all want to know one thing and I want to get right to the point. Why is your image being tarnished so easily? Do critical words really take away from how far you have come since you were declared a basket case by a racist, mass murderer?
Colour no issue as it’s a boy, Bangladeshi matchmaker says on royal family controversy
A Bangladeshi matchmaker kicked up furious debate after she said she did not agree with the British royal family’s concern about the skin colour of Meghan Markle and her less famous husband’s son.
‘Only upload photos’: Country’s Facebook expert suggests
Unpopular philosopher Choclates once said, “I have nothing to say lest it should fall under any act and thus my act of speaking gets deactivated forever.”
Government officially launches The Snitches Club
The Government of Chapasthan officially launched The Snitches Club earlier yesterday. An initiative of the Ministry of Misinformation, the club was inaugurated by the country’s leader, who attended virtually from their official residence.
Entering the dawn of the critical woman
Kim Kardashian, Priyanka Chopra and Kangana Ranaut. These are just some women critical thinkers who were not sent to jail. The list has been cherry-picked so we can all have a laugh and by all, you know exactly who we mean.
Traffic sergeants go on strike, threaten to leave it up to traffic lights
Traffic Sergeants Anonymous (TSA) have announced in a press release that they have had enough of the lawless traffic situation in Chapasthan and will now leave the situation up to traffic lights.
Broke millennials wage social media war at queue to buy cheap onions
A group of snazzily dressed millennials, most working in creative content making and other such artsy fields, yesterday clashed on social media platform ‘Brainbook’ over the long queue to purchase government allotted cheap onions.