The week in re(ar)view

Photo: STAR

Say hello to the dog-tor
Dogs are slowly moving up in the world. They no longer have to sniff through garbage or bite pedestrian bottom to feed themselves. They can simply take a post in a hospital and become a dog-tor when the doctors are away. Inside page of the June 18 Daily Star included a lovely picture of a dog doing the rounds inside the pediatric ward in Kishoreganj Adhunik Hospital. They sure take the meaning of the word 'adhunik' (modern) to its extreme sense.

Voter listing is hot work
June 14 it was reported that the voter list would not be revised by going door-to-door. The officials will be fixing it while sitting in the cool comforts of their offices. Instead people will be asked to come to the election commission offices and register their names. Sure, make the people work so that all the money can be saved (preferably in the offficials' savings accounts). Lawyers consider it illegal.

Better yet they can simply pick a name from the previous list and flip a coin to see whether or not it can be included in the new list. Problem is it will get repetitive and boring for officials who have nothing else to do.

On June 19 Chief Election Commissioner (CEC) M A Aziz told reporters that door-to-door listing is not possible as per high court orders. We sympathise with him because the heat outside is terrible.

The disabled are getting rich
Prime Minister Khaleda Zia launched a programme on 13 June allocating 25 crore taka for the physically challenged. 160 people were handed over cheques of 2400 taka each. The programme will provide over one lakh people with the mind bogglingly high monthly stipend of 200 taka. Here's proof that something is not necessarily better than nothing. It is very close to nothing.

Power, Interrupted
While watching a football match in Gokhras house in Jigatola we noticed a weird power fluctuation. Throughout the game electricity stayed on. But during other times it would go out and then come back within five minutes. That's how the quota was covered mainly because they power supply people were afraid of being lynched.

Angry football fans attacked a couple of power supply offices in Khulna on June 13. School and colleges brought out processions demanding uninterrupted power supply. You won't see anyone getting similarly heated up about trifling matters like education unless it is the protest about the right to copy during exams.

Killer billboards
What goes up must invariably come down. Damn you Newton for sleeping under the apple tree and discovering gravity. Everything here falls down killing people. Over bridges, buildings and now billboards. One came down in a storm over a CNG filling station in Pragati Sharani killing the security guard and damaging cars. Apparently the structural frame was weak. Hey, can't blame the makers for saving up some of the steel beams for building their own houses. It is a sign of the times.

Talking to strangers
When parents tell us not to talk to strangers it also means we should not bring them home and then have our throats slit. That's what happened to three classmates in East Monipur in the city when they went to hang out at a friends empty apartment along with three new kids on the block. Little did the classmates know they would become the new kids on the chopping block. The unknown kids tied them up, slit their throats, looted the place and left and were eventually caught a few days later. Luckily the classmates lived though what their parent will do to them later is anyone's guess.

By Gokhra and Mood Dude

As I moved Kaká, my AC Milan midfielder through the onslaught of Arsenal defence, my friend Sayman was quite quick to bring his last man, Sol Campbell (or 'mota' Campbell as he likes to call him) to the rescue. I was full of zeal, as I had passed through quite a formidable midfield line-up to reach mota. His sheer presence made me give a through pass to Shevchenko for the score. Unfortunately, his injury prevented him from even reaching the ball and I cursed myself for not having seen the injury sign earlier. The ball was soon on my side of the field and I watched in shock as it found its way to Thierry Henry. Sweat beads started dripping from my hands and I fought hard to keep them from reaching my thumbs, fervently fingering the joystick of the Play Station 2 (PS2) console. Henry swerved left, turboed right, and with a step over fake, took his shot. This was one time I wished it got me in the heart, or rather, my keeper Dida in the heart. It missed and found its way to the back of the net. Two - two final score. As my adversary did his victory dance, having recovered from two goals down, I tried to imagine what I did wrong. I must have had a head rush of World Cup Fever that's in the air.

Konami had taken the game of soccer on video games to the next level with its hit title 'Pro Evolution Soccer 5' (PES), and I was busy practising for a PES Championship to take place right here in Dhaka. Starting on June 30, 2006, this tournament should see fans from all over Bangladesh come together to lead their favourite club teams to football glory. Motion Avenue will be organising this championship, where hundreds of our local football hooligans will lock heads on 29 inch tv screens and projectors. Details of the event can be obtained from http://pes.bluebd.com or SMS “pes” to 2583. Virgin Soft Drinks and Oriental Services are the proud sponsors of this 'first of its kind' sports genre title. I am still waiting to see if the officials of this championship lets the weather conditions be set to 'variable', which may lead to patchy rain or snow. This will surely enhance the realism and the unpredictable nature of the games leaving some fans happy and some, well soaked! Some fans will surely go down in blazes of glory but I hope I can bag the winning cash of Tk 20,000 or even the second prize of Tk 10,000. One way or another, soccer surely reigns supreme this year.

By Imran H. Khan

Dream, my beauty
On the bed of caressing kash phul
Innocent like a child
White like an angel,
And I will nourish your hair
With krishnachura petals
And your scent with
Bakul phul bought with
The joy of the deprived girls
Running from street to street
Just to sell the white aromas.
Your surroundings I will decorate
With the velvet silk
Of the exotic violet aparazita,
While nayantaras soaked in dew
On the first sun will glitter,
And the first kodom that blooms
In the badol days
I will fetch just for you;
I will invade the beehives
To steal their fresh nectar
Of sandhamalati only for you,
Just to see the edge
Of your lips when you smile.
And no kaminee will ever
Dare invade my eyes;
You are my Kaminee,
You have taken away my life.

By Adnan M. S. Fakir