The week in re(ar)view

RAJUK officials learn alchemy
As reported on 28 July, RAJUK officials have apparently learned the secrets of alchemy. They cannot yet directly turn anything into gold but they have found other ways that can achieve the same result. It seems they can create dry land out of water which when sold off buys gold. Land is created in the name of making footpaths alongside the Banani Lake which are later sold off. Apparently RAJUK officials also know how to build never ending footpaths.

Choosing between death and motherland
Thousands of Bangladeshis were stuck in war struck Lebanon not because they could not get out but because they did not WANT to. Most of them are paid huge sums to go there for work and are afraid they will not be able to go back. It seems risking life over there is favourable to coming back to Bangladesh. Now what does that say about our country?

Hall of Fame inductees
Mobile court has recently started its operation again. This time among many of the culprits/victims notable ones included Chalet Restaurant on Sonargaon Road that was caught trying to cook rotten chicken. Does that mean customer cannot tell the difference when rotten meat is cooked?

Also admitted in our Mobile Court Hall of Fame are Dhaka Medical College Hospital, Central Hospital and Lab Aid for having date expired medicines as well as unsanitary environment. This happened on 31 July.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, sewage to street
A report on 27 July reported that Dhaka Wasa was reportedly dumping raw sewage onto the road out of the sewer until reporters arrived on the scene. We always thought sewage goes into a sewer not the other way around.

Apparently the sewerage line near Gulshan cirle-1 was blocked and authorities decided to pump it out onto the street. They stopped doing so when photographers started snapping away.

By Gokhra and Mood Dude

RS Mailbx

Evolution taking a backward step
The 27 July issue included an article on the Power of Evolution. Its author Ashiqur Rahman Adit has some very unique theories. 'Whales were once cows' for example. By the way, they weren't.

Ashiqur states 'Humans many centuries ago lived very long lives, about 500 1000 years.' Which centuries? The 11th? 15th? Oh wait, that theory makes no sense otherwise some of those humans would still be alive. And just so you know, lifespans are increasing, not decreasing. Seriously, where is this information coming from? More importantly, who actually believes a mosquito is a small bird?

Oh, and creatures do not decide to evolve as Ashiqur suggests. Let me explain with a very cliché example: If a grass patch is mowed frequently, then the shortest dandelions have the best chance of survival because lawnmower blades can't reach them, and future generations will also be shorter because of similar genetic material, enabling the species to survive.

But according to Ashiqur, the dandelions all got together over coffee and decided short is great, just as dinosaurs - also according to Ashiqur - decided to shrink their organs because they couldn't find enough food.

I've never laughed so hard over a publication. The only problem is that several thousand kids now think their ancestors lived to the ripe old age of around 900.

Aren't you guys concerned? Sure, Rising Stars isn't exactly scholarly material, but I'm sure its readers want at least a minimal level of professionalism in its publication.

Why would we want to read lies? And don't use the “it was a satirical spoof” excuse this time because young children can't yet understand satire.
Sajid, Dhaka

As mentioned in the corrigendum, this was a bad instance where articles became mixed up. We regret the fact that an unedited factually wrong article went into print We greatly appreciate having readers such as yourself who make the effort to rectify a mistake.

Man evolves in reverse
Until I saw the cartoon on evolution printed in the back page of last RS issue, I never realised just how much or rather how little man has really evolved. In fact, my husband very closely resembles the original caveman with the curly locks. Despite being a loving person he can be quite a slob. Is that how men all over the world really are?
Sharmeen Akhter

Now if this query was answered by a female the reply would be 'YES'. Since at this very moment it is being replied by a male the reply stands as “Hell no!”

Fresh fotos wanted…………oops, we meant photos
I have a serious gripe with RS. It is the one source of getting fresh and original news, reviews and bios of local music bands. But when the article comes out it is almost always accompanied by pictures, which are simply a copy of what's on the album cover, e.g Arbovirus last week.

Can't RS use exclusive pictures to go with the music related articles? Or are the bands so hot that getting them to provide pictures or appear for photo shoots is akin to finding weapons of mass destruction?
Sameer Ahmed Ovi

The bands are generally quite nice and humble but your point and gripe is well taken.

This is in context to the article by Adeeba and friends. First of all, I would like to thank these girls for sharing their thoughts with us. Oh all right, I am coming straight to the point. I was very offended after I read that article. The views of the girls not only strengthened the points made by Adnan, but also, proved that they don't have any humanity in their cruel hearts.

Adnan was wrong. We can't only call them "future scary moms". Because the tone in which they wrote the article, it seemed that they would beat Adnan to a pulp once he sets foot out of his house! Adeeba was right, we shouldn't offend our moms by calling them "future scary moms". Instead, we should call them "future prime ministers". Because while I was reading the article, it felt as if I was hearing a lecture by a politician". And whether you like it or not, the prime minister of Bangladesh is also a woman!

The article not only showed that how rude girls can be, but also that how "low they can go?" But, life would have been a hell to us-boys-if all the women in this world were as cruel as Adeeba and co. We should thank the Almighty for this.

Amen!Adeeba and co. said that boys are prone to imitate feminine like traits. Well, it's not our fault that you are old fashioned as my grandmother.

What will you girls say if I ask you "Why do you wear T-shirts and jeans and why do you keep short hair like boys?" And don't tell us anything about the programs we watch on TV, because I know how mad you girls can be about Indian soaps!But the whole woman population of the earth can't be blamed just because some, such as Adeeba are the biased ones.

And at last, but not least, I would like to say that I wouldn't have lost my precious time or energy to write this article. But the provocations Adeeba and co. made simply crossed the limit. Not only did they offend our bro Adnan, but also the entire manhood. We don't hate girls, but you guys force us to hate you. Adnan only pointed out some facts, which were harsh. Probably, this is why some say, "Truth is stranger than fiction".

By The Dark Lord

Our combined effort saved lives in the past, lives of many children and youth. And we believe that this time too we can make the impossible happen, our unity can kindle a light that's dying fast.

Ahmad Hamim Labib, aged 13 is suffering from acute Lymphoblast Leukemia with testicular relapses. As per the doctors, he is in a high-risk group and has only a few months left before he succumbs to death. The only treatment that can save Labib now is ”Bone Marrow Transplantation." The approximate expense of this treatment is nearly tk.40 lacs, which Labib's parents can't even dream to bear. Labib's parents, who are teachers, have already exhausted themselves financially, mentally and physically to save their beloved child. They now look forward to your financial assistance and blessings to save their son. Your donation, no matter how small the amount is, can make the biggest difference in Labib's life.

To contribute to Labib's medical treatment fund please donate addressing Dr. Aliza Mamataz, A/c # 22631, Janata Bank, Dhaka Medical College Hospital (DMCH) Branch, Dhaka. You can also contact at 0156346800.

By Wara Karim

Here's our monthly case of mistaken identity. Last week in the back page we printed an article titled 'The Power of Evolution”. Unfortunately we printed the wrong writers' name. The problem was that we received two articles with a similar name and it got mixed up during editing. The printed matter was actually written by Ashiqur Rahman Adit from Comilla and not Nuhash Humayun. Regrettably also, the unedited version that contained several factual errors was accidentally printed instead. It appears we still have not evolved to the stage where we can publish an error free issue.