Published on 05:45 PM, October 18, 2023

#Perspective

Fighting ageism: Can you allow us to age gracefully, please?

Oh! The impossible standards of beauty. As if it was not enough to have to conform in one's youth, the menacing shadow of ageism slowly steals away whatever is left of feminine grace and authenticity, well into our waning years.

Our unforgiving, superficial society is a lover of beauty, quick to criticise whoever does not fit their stereotypes of grace and elegance. Does it matter that she works 16-hour days? Or, she has just given birth, or gone through surgery? Do the silent and the not-so-silent beauty police care if she's going through hormonal changes or that she — dare we say it — is not going through anything at all but is actually just perfectly happy in her skin?

In case you are wondering, the above questions are rhetorical; it does not matter and they do not care. All they want are drop-dead-gorgeous women, well into their 80s, with perfect (and perfectly natural) skin, teeth and hair, not to mention hourglass figures and slender physiques.

Impossible, you say? But why? All that one needs to look like this are a few hours at an expensive gym with a personal trainer every other day, a costly anti-ageing beauty regime and your very own organic farm where you grow fruits and vegetables fertilised from the rear end of some Himalayan goat species that feeds on grass imported from heaven. How hard is that? If Aishwarya Rai and Kareena Kapoor Khan were not spared, who are we commoners to complain?

Yes, you read that right. Kareena Kapoor, once the darling of Bollywood, has recently been criticised for looking old and withdrawn, especially in her last OTT appearance, Jaane Jaan. The 43-year-old actress is famous for her no-makeup look and one would think that she would be lauded for appearing to be confident in the very healthy, natural, glowing skin that she sports at her age. But who cares about skin unless it's cosily layered under thousands of bank-breaking, high-end cosmetic products, right?

With so much pressure to age without looking old, would you blame the most beautiful diva of the yesteryears, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan for (allegedly) wanting to get some skin tightening done? Of course, you can. You can blame women, especially ageing ones, for almost anything under the roof. Their sole purpose in life, after all, is to be eye candy for the onlookers. Their biggest crime? Killing themselves trying to comply.

The truth is, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan did not look artificial and bulky on the ramp at the Paris Fashion Week. Nor does Kareena Kapoor appear haggard when barefaced. These women, just like plenty of others in the world, celebrities or otherwise, simply dare to look different from the aesthetic society has in their minds for them. And they are happy doing it. That's where the ugliness lies for the onlookers. And exactly where the sheer confidence and raw sensuality of a woman peeks through.