Published on 12:00 AM, February 03, 2024

Satire

Dhaka man loves metro rail so much that it’s affecting his relationship

Photo: Prabir Das

The MRT-6 running at near full service has changed the lives of millions of Dhakaites. But for one Mirpur man, the changes have reached his home and private life.

Bijoy Jhikjhik used to travel between his workplace in Karwanbazar and his home in Mirpur 11 on buses, motorcycles, and CNG-run auto-rickshaws even a few months ago. But once the service was open during evenings, he decided to give the metro a go.

"For years, I suffered along with my neighbours from the construction woes of the metro rail. I had a healthy hatred for this project, and I was half certain it would fail. I decided I'd use it once so I could find enough problems with it to complain about for the rest of my life. But that didn't go quite how I expected," he told this reporter during a conversation that took place inside a restaurant in Mirpur 10 overlooking the metro rail.

Bijoy Jhikjhik kept staring longingly at the trains zooming by the whole time.

"When I emerged from the second floor onto the platform on an escalator, the first thing I noticed was the shiny metallic platform screen doors. I was instantly enamoured. Then when the PA system went *ding ding dong* and the lady said, 'The train to Motijheel station is arriving on Platform 1', I think it was the first time I had ever heard someone say Motijheel with such passion, conviction, and … and love," said Bijoy Jhikjhik.

"It was a classic tale of romance, from hatred and disdain to a tiny spark, a spark that has now turned into an inferno of undying love for which I'm ready to do anything. Every time the long, slithering train enters a station, I shudder with joy. Every time the thick, undulating carriages leave the station, I find myself in the throes of ecstasy," he added.

Bijoy's wife, Pooja Jhikjhik (aka Poo Jhikjhik) however, has not been a fan of this newfound passion in her husband's life.

"It's like he's in love with these trains. He thinks they're sentient, and that the woman whose voice they use on the PA is the actual voice of the trains. He refers to the metro rail as 'she', his phone is full of selfies he takes with the train, and every evening at 8, he cries because they shut down the metro for the night. It's ridiculous," complained Poo Jhikjhik.

 "I think he now loves the metro rail more than he loves me, his actual wife. Last year, on December 28, he brought home a cake and asked everyone to gather around to cut it. I opened the box and it turned out to be a train shaped cake that he had ordered specially because it was the one year birthday of the metro. I felt extremely insulted because it was my birthday on December 28 as well, and my husband forgot my birthday but didn't forget the metro rail's opening anniversary. When I started crying, he told me to stop being dramatic and that I was stealing metro rail's thunder on her special day. IT WAS MY SPECIAL DAY!"

Bijoy Jhikjhik doesn't deny any of this but he claims he is a man of love, and his love is too intense to be limited to just one person. He hopes his wife and the metro rail can come to an understanding so he can just love them both forever.

"Yes, I only take my wife to restaurants from where the metro rail is visible, but that's only because I want to be able to look at the two people in my life I love the most all at once. Soon, our little family of three is going to invite a fourth member, once they get the BRT-3 open from Airport to Gazipur up and running," he said.