Is body neutrality our way out of unattainable beauty standards?
When I had my first pimple in fourth grade, I was devastated. I would rush to the mirror every 15 minutes, hoping the pimple would be gone, and go to bed with a pea-sized dollop of toothpaste on the zit (please, don't do this to your skin).
Over time, my attitude towards my skin changed. Initially for the worse, and then for the better.
At first, I was sucked into the movement of radical body positivity that told me everything about me was absolutely divine and it would be a pathetic waste of my life if I did not have a crush on me. However, I found it stressful to fall in love with myself. I would be in my head constantly, reminding myself to see some abstract beauty in all my human imperfections.
I do not recall how I grew out of it but I did. I no longer feel the need to cringe at myself, nor do I force myself to be my own muse. I only make sure I'm eating well, getting enough sleep, not stressing too much, and drinking enough water. Not so that my pimples vanish, but more so that I know I live a healthy life.
Recently, I have learned that my newfound acceptance of my appearance, as it is without any forced appreciation, has a name – body neutrality. The term was originally coined by body image coach Anna Poirier in 2015 to help her clients have healthier, more practical relationships with food and exercise.
Poirier's belief was that the concept of body positivity can be too big of a jump for some people. Not everyone can transform their frustration with their cellulite or rosacea into seamless confidence and self-love overnight, or even over years, regardless of how natural or common they are.
Simply accepting the body for what it is and being grateful for all its functions, on the other hand, are attitudes people can adapt to more easily. They also help people become healthier more holistically – physically, mentally, and emotionally. After all, one will be more mindful when they work out for strength or health, instead of their goal to achieve the perfect summer body.
Similarly, thanking the body for all the wonders it does for us every day will make one appreciate their bodies more and make them feel more comfortable in it.
Beauty can still be on one's list of desirable traits for themselves and in no way does body neutrality deny that. All it simply asks is to not prioritise beauty over everything and to move towards self-love at a more realistic pace instead of shoving forced affirmations down one's throat.
If one happens to see beauty in all their flaws, great. But if one does not, they can aim to see the beauty in the functionality of their body before moving on to its appearance. After all, like most things in life, it is what is on the inside that counts the most.