Published on 06:45 PM, February 01, 2023

A step-by-step look into how introverts make plans

Design: Abir Hossain

We all have that one friend who needs a little nudge to come out of their shell. Sometimes they refuse, other times they push through. As the saying goes, these are introverts that we have adopted with loving arms and despite their hermit-like tendencies, we love them. 

Here's a glimpse into how making plans go for such individuals.  

Agreeing to the plan

You might approach them days, or even weeks before asking if they would like to hang out with a few friends. In most cases, they agree without much hesitation. They are, for the most part, excited about it. This enthusiasm of theirs is not any form of deception though. They truly want to be a part of it and are thrilled to be invited.  

Contributing to the planning process 

You obviously want to figure out a place and time to meet up. Your introverted friend will only suggest the very best for the entire group. However, it is likely that they will recommend a place they have been to multiple times (most likely alone) and know the menu inside out.  

They might even insist on inviting more people. Overall, it feels great when you feel like you are not alone in the planning process and that this time, your introvert will make an appearance.   

The excuses  

This is where things start getting a little suspicious.

Just mere days before the big day, they tell you that they are suddenly feeling a little sick, their cat is being extra clingy, have numerous deadlines coming up, or that their mum has said "no" to any outings because of some dispute that's been blown out of proportion.  

You might even tell them that it is okay to reschedule. Regardless, they assure you that they will "try" to show up, even for an hour, and not make any changes for their sake. 

They pray something comes up

Even with an array of excuses ready to be set in motion, they hate lying to you. So, they start praying and hope that something does come up to prevent them from showing up. If they are lucky, which they rarely are in such cases, something does come up.  

Decision day and regret 

They wake up in the morning on the day of the hangout not knowing what to do. Do they go because they agreed upon it? Do they cancel at the last moment? The decision is bloodcurdling.  

Whatever it is they decide to do, the feeling of regret is inevitable. They attend and regret showing up because there are too many people, they feel awkward, something feels off, or they just feel tired. They regret not having a fake emergency call set up beforehand which would give them an excuse to leave early. If they do not attend, they later regret missing out on the fun and worry if they will get invited again.  

Maybe you are one of these introverts and keep turning down plans that make you nervous. Just remember, you do not have to agree to everything in the moment. You are not obligated to and your friends will understand. Sometimes just passing up the opportunity is good enough. 

Puja does nothing but read Gaiman and drinks unhealthy amounts of coffee. Send her cat photos at facebook.com/pspspspspspspspspspspuwu/