University student still haunted by general knowledge he memorised

"I had to start going to therapy soon afterwards," Shadman shared his grief to the press. "I have friends who went through 10 years of public school, so finding a good therapist wasn't a problem. But in the first session, when I shared my nightmares haunted by the irrelevant and inapplicable information I memorised during my university preparation, my therapist also started crying. Turns out, as an aspiring BCS candidate in the past, she's actually the CEO of irrelevant GKs. It took her years to let go of her own trauma and accept a life without GK. But now, we're both looking for a therapist."

Shadman was just like any other teenager out there – afraid to resist his dream getting stomped on by his parents and too lazy to do anything about it. Peer pressure attracted Shadman to Science just like rumoured cameos attract Marvel fans to theatres, "In class 10, my best friend got 84 out of 100 in Physics whereas I got 17. Yet I dared to follow him to science in college. If my best friend is the latest cryptocurrency, I'm the nerd sitting behind a computer and going all-in with my dad's credit card."

While Shadman's parents took 10 years to give up on their child, Shadman only needed 10 days of classes to do the same, "Somewhere around the second week in the middle of my organic chemistry class, I realised that memorising irrelevant information has always been my dream. My parents had also been supportive of my decision since I was the middle child and they already had an elder son whose dreams they could butcher. You see, when you have three children in your family, parents' expectations keep getting lower with each child. My youngest brother, for instance, had all the freedom in the world to pursue anything ranging from music, drama or even sports! He, of course, went for BBA."

Now, after 2 years of university, Shadman's days of memorising GKs from MP3 guides are behind him. Yet, his nightmares are far from over.

"They keep floating in my head at night! I only remember these random numbers, figures and years yet I can't seem to remember which is which. For all I care, Emperor Akbar probably inaugurated the first nuclear powerplant of southeast Asia on the 23rd of June, 1757."

Psychologists have coined a new term to explain these symptoms: PGSD, or "Post-GK Stress Disorder".

"Initially found among medical school aspirants and D-Unit examinees of different public universities, PGSD reaches its extremities among BCS aspirants. Patients are found lurking around in the lanes of Farmgate and Arambagh, trying to dump more irrelevant information in their already rotten brains," explains Dr Sigma Fraud.

Meanwhile, Dr Shingarazzaman, VC of Shahbagh University explains their meticulous selection process in the entrance exams, saying, "Let's face it, nobody wakes up one morning and says 'I want to be a D-Unit examinee once I grow up.' You're settling for this department so clearly, ambition's not your cup of tea. Where do all the ambitionless souls with crushed dreams end up? BCS. We're simply preparing our students for the balderdash they should expect from life."

Remind Ifti to be quieter at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com