Style is subjective to location, money and passing of puberty. Cars are an expression of style and individuality. And to express the individuality in more unique ways, we accessorise. Like fashion, you can pick a classic 501 straight jeans from Levi's or you could experiment and get yourself the parachute pajamas worn by three M C Hammers at the same time. Both get attention but is it what you want? Here's a list of car fads that are still providing vacation money for owners of car decoration shops at Bangla Motor. 

Bullet holes
Bullet holes were pretty cool almost never. It's like walking around with fake scars on your face. The mantra for stickers on cars: if it's not real, then don't put it on your car. That goes for bullet holes. Only cool ones are the real ones you can put a finger through. 

Your car name everywhere
A big sticker saying Toyota on your Toyota is like putting a label on an orange saying it is indeed an orange. We know it, they know it and the government knows it. Those that do not, do not care. Go ahead and put your name on it instead. Usually it helps identify hit-and-run drivers more easily. 

Emblems that do not belong
Vtech, EVO, TRD, AMG and so on. Normal people who think cars are just silver or black will find those alphabets to be gibberish. That is okay because some car people find them gibberish too, but rather cool gibberish. This ensemble of alphabets is badges and emblems that belong to only certain makes and models. For example 'GT-R' stands for a monster performance car from NIssan. But in Bangladesh, it is a common sight on any Toyota, Mitsubishi, motorcycle, rickshaw and public bus. Because the 'R' sounds cool when you pronounce it as an angry 'aarrrrr'. It's much easier to Google and find out what goes with a particular car. 

Cartoon: Ehsanur Raza Ronny

Flowers, toys, dolls
There are only three instances you can legitimately use plastic flowers. 
For a TV show set.
For the house you built in the desert. 
As a gift to a girl that likes flowers who believes plants have feelings. 
A car is not a garden, fake or otherwise. Yet we see car dashboards and rear shelves decorated with the drastic plastic stuff. Same with toy cars displayed in real cars. And no, you cannot display severed goat heads either. 

Photo: LS Archive/Amirul Rajiv

Fake scoops and vents
Race cars have many holes, ducts and scoops to make them look lethally feral. Those holes also serve a purpose. They draw in air to a location where it is needed such as a duct in front bumper to cool front brakes. By association, you can put a scoop on your car and it becomes a racecar instantly. But it doesn't. I had an old Datsun that had so many holes from rust, that its holes even had holes in them. Those were real holes but not functional. 

Fartcan
That really is the name for a non-functional loud exhaust. A proper free breathing exhaust allows your car to do just that, breathe a bit more freely and release some power. This freedom causes the air passing to create a little more noise than that approved by original designers. That's the science. Turns out, more noise is not more power. In fact, an oversized exhaust (known as howler in Bangladesh) can even reduce your power and engine response by reducing the pressure of the exhaust gases. It is like the political speeches. The louder they are, the less substance there is. 

Wings
Wings/spoilers serve two purposes. Either they create a bit of down force to make cars' rear end get pushed down to the road at higher speeds. Or they create a little smoother air flow to help decrease drag. But the most important reason is to make the car look good. But the limit is not sky high. In fact, when the spoiler keeps reaching towards the sky, it becomes more suitable for hanging clothes on. We forgive the F40, Supra and Imprezza STi for having massive spoilers. Those cars needed it to stick to the road at high speeds. Big spoiler on your family runabout is like silicone implants for a body builder: looks the part but doesn't do a thing. 

Photo: LS Archive/Amirul Rajiv

Chrome
Chrome is yesterdays glitz like oil-lit brass chandeliers in every room. There is a time for that and it passed many years ago. Chrome looked good on classics. A subtle stripe or on an emblem on a modern car is acceptable. But when you buy the whole pack to decorate every light, door handle, bumper strip and so on with chrome on your Corolla, it looks like you're not quite the rich Arab oil billionaire yet. 

Photo: LS Archive/Amirul Rajiv

Lamborghini style doors
The Lamborghini wowed the world when the Countach became the first production car to open its door skyward. Lamborghini did it many times afterward with each car becoming a design classic. Truth is that Lambo doors as they are known, don't translate so well to cars that are meant to be utilitarian and functional. Lambo doors are impractical. They are heavier, costlier and more likely to hit the ceiling of a low garage than regular outward opening doors. Even Lamborghini often thinks it is not always a cool thing. The Latest Huracan does away with scissor doors. 

Police Strobe Kit and LED underglow
Hooking up a blue-red police light to our car doesn't make one into an action movie super cop. Being able to kick a mustachioed bad guy into outer space does. Or sliding a mustachioed horse under a truck. Police strobe lights just make a person look silly. Yes on-cop-car black Lancer EX in Mohammadpur, I am talking about you. You can buy these lights at many car decoration shops. They are also explicitly illegal. These would look cooler in your bedroom because illegal stuff is always better in the bedroom. 

Then there is the glow from below. When someone said let there be light, that godly being did not mean that there should be light seeping out of every nook and cranny of a car. The first Fast and Furious movie introduced the neon craze to Bangladesh. Every car needed lights on the underside so you could see exactly what kind of dirt you were parked on. This fad has mostly died but some valiantly fight on. Currently people have taken to lighting up the wheel wells and break disc/drum dust plate to create glowing wheels. 

Despite all that, the suggestion is to do whatever the heck you want with your car. Our cities are rather dreary. Big, blocky building, coaching centre, posters everywhere and empty 'jhaalmuri' packets on the road. Such highly decorated cars offer a break from the rows and rows of boring silver Premallions lining the traffic jams.

Cartoon: Ehsanur Raza Ronny 
Photo: LS Archive/Amirul Rajiv