How not to ruin conversations

Starting a conversation and keeping them on are the most uncomfortable sweat-breakers some of us face every day. While it's easier with people we instantly click with, strangers and social friends seem to fall inside unchartered territory as we struggle with awkward silences. But more often than not, we ourselves are the ones to blame for conversations that drop dead in the middle. Here are a few pointers on how to avoid that.

Don't reply with nonchalant sounds

Conversations can't continue if you constantly throw "hmm"s and "uhuh"s at the other party. Encourage them to talk more about what they just said or follow through with a question rather than just nodding your head in affirmation.

Don't act distracted

Glancing at notifications on your phone and looking all around you while the person in front is explaining their next big idea, is a clear sign for saying "I'm not interested". But then again, you are. Your attention should be on what they're saying and not on your surroundings. Listen better, talk better.

Show enthusiasm while listening

While we often perfect the art of speaking and become excited while talking about things that are important to us, listening in a welcoming manner is a skill we are yet to master. Sit upright, make eye contact and most important of all- bring out a smile or an inquisitive face while hearing someone speak. Your face tells a lot about how you're taking it all in. If you look interested, people will feel more comfortable sharing stories that matter to them.

Avoid sounding aggressive

A good conversation goes both ways and it's very possible that you two might have different opinions on a certain topic. If you disagree with something, explain your stand in a casual way and back it up with proper reasoning. Don't swear and get hostile. Being conservative in a discussion is going to shut down any window for a second point of view.

Don't repeat every comment

I used to do this and know how destructive it can be. They say the movie was awesome and you repeat it after them, they say it's a good book- you say it's a good book, they say the weather sucks- the weather sucks for you too. Don't do that. The secret to handling these situations is to ask questions about the topic and leave it to them to elaborate.

Try to stay within common ground

Talking about topics you don't know much about, just because it falls under the other guy's comfort zone, can often backfire. Try to stay within common ground and bring up areas of discussion you're both well-acquainted with.