Satireday

‘I own many houses in the US only to make better sewerage systems back home’

Says chief of Chasa

Task Jong Un, one of the most intense workaholics in Chapasthan, exhibited his diligence once again by taking his responsibilities to another level.

He has been observing the US's highly developed water supply sewerage system for years in order to improve Chapasthan's system.

We have all heard of swimming lessons and khichuri-cooking lessons held in some foreign countries. Task Jong Un, the emperor of Chapasthan Water Supply and Sewerage Authority (Chasa), partook in such a learning session titled 'How to Manage Your City' in the USA.

He has already completed his decade-long training, according to new photos where he was seen checking the water and sewerage systems of some 14 houses in the US.

When asked what he was actually doing, he said, "You guys have always abused me for living in America while working in Chapasthan, but you don't know the actual reason. Had you known, you wouldn't have dared bother me with such silly questions while I am working to give you Chapasthani fellas a good life."

"I pay water bill every month, but I get juice instead. Neither me nor my children are interested to drink juice constantly. Will Chasa ever listen to us and stop blessing us with their juice?" Arparina, a local from Gatrabari.

After an official apology, our correspondent asked the reason again and the man said, "Well, you should always be sorry instead of worrying about my job. You guys don't do what you are supposed to do. However, I built here several houses, of course with my own money, just to see how America's water and sewerage system works. Once I have gleaned all necessary learnings, I will go back to my country and implement there. Maybe it is taking some time, but I promise you, I will do it before the end of the 21st century."

People of Dhoka city have been blessed with water and other supplies provided by Chasa. But they have been complaining about what the authorities have termed a "beautiful problem".

People are getting slightly orange-coloured juice instead of water. Of course, juice costs more than water, but still most of the people prefer water to juice.

"I pay water bill every month, but I get juice instead. Neither me nor my children are interested to drink juice constantly. Will Chasa ever listen to us and stop blessing us with their juice?" Arparina, a local from Gatrabari.

"If ST Coleridge were alive today and he had to write The Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner again, he would write, "Juice, juice everywhere, not a drop to drink," Munna, a local poet who has been publishing his romantic poems exclusively in girls' inboxes, said.

But the unimaginable and eccentric long-term plan of the Chasa emperor should now soothe the Dhoka dwellers' headaches.

Houses in foreign lands with water and sewerage facilities have already been built and the observation, by the emperor himself, is underway. The reason these houses were built is crystal clear to everyone and a round of applause for the emperor can be expected.

This Satireday correspondent asked the emperor if there were any alternative plans if his "housebuilding and observing" plan failed, he said, "Of course, I have Plan-B. There are a lot of homeless people in Chapasthan sleeping next to the road. If I cannot succeed in my 'observation' plan, I will bring those homeless people to America and gift my houses to them. Now, stop criticising a humanitarian like me."

At the end of the interview, Task was spotted in deep conversation with an engineer, leaving this correspondent thinking that the process of building house number 17 may have just started.

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‘I own many houses in the US only to make better sewerage systems back home’

Says chief of Chasa

Task Jong Un, one of the most intense workaholics in Chapasthan, exhibited his diligence once again by taking his responsibilities to another level.

He has been observing the US's highly developed water supply sewerage system for years in order to improve Chapasthan's system.

We have all heard of swimming lessons and khichuri-cooking lessons held in some foreign countries. Task Jong Un, the emperor of Chapasthan Water Supply and Sewerage Authority (Chasa), partook in such a learning session titled 'How to Manage Your City' in the USA.

He has already completed his decade-long training, according to new photos where he was seen checking the water and sewerage systems of some 14 houses in the US.

When asked what he was actually doing, he said, "You guys have always abused me for living in America while working in Chapasthan, but you don't know the actual reason. Had you known, you wouldn't have dared bother me with such silly questions while I am working to give you Chapasthani fellas a good life."

"I pay water bill every month, but I get juice instead. Neither me nor my children are interested to drink juice constantly. Will Chasa ever listen to us and stop blessing us with their juice?" Arparina, a local from Gatrabari.

After an official apology, our correspondent asked the reason again and the man said, "Well, you should always be sorry instead of worrying about my job. You guys don't do what you are supposed to do. However, I built here several houses, of course with my own money, just to see how America's water and sewerage system works. Once I have gleaned all necessary learnings, I will go back to my country and implement there. Maybe it is taking some time, but I promise you, I will do it before the end of the 21st century."

People of Dhoka city have been blessed with water and other supplies provided by Chasa. But they have been complaining about what the authorities have termed a "beautiful problem".

People are getting slightly orange-coloured juice instead of water. Of course, juice costs more than water, but still most of the people prefer water to juice.

"I pay water bill every month, but I get juice instead. Neither me nor my children are interested to drink juice constantly. Will Chasa ever listen to us and stop blessing us with their juice?" Arparina, a local from Gatrabari.

"If ST Coleridge were alive today and he had to write The Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner again, he would write, "Juice, juice everywhere, not a drop to drink," Munna, a local poet who has been publishing his romantic poems exclusively in girls' inboxes, said.

But the unimaginable and eccentric long-term plan of the Chasa emperor should now soothe the Dhoka dwellers' headaches.

Houses in foreign lands with water and sewerage facilities have already been built and the observation, by the emperor himself, is underway. The reason these houses were built is crystal clear to everyone and a round of applause for the emperor can be expected.

This Satireday correspondent asked the emperor if there were any alternative plans if his "housebuilding and observing" plan failed, he said, "Of course, I have Plan-B. There are a lot of homeless people in Chapasthan sleeping next to the road. If I cannot succeed in my 'observation' plan, I will bring those homeless people to America and gift my houses to them. Now, stop criticising a humanitarian like me."

At the end of the interview, Task was spotted in deep conversation with an engineer, leaving this correspondent thinking that the process of building house number 17 may have just started.

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