Diplomats to receive negotiation training from aunties

With so many global issues impacting the locals, including climate change, river crisis and resource depletion, the country's foreign service has hatched a plan to effectively train a new generation of diplomats to be able to hone essential bargaining skills.

The responsibility of training to these rookie diplomats will be at the hands of neighbourhood aunties who will not only teach cadets how to negotiate, but also ensure that their professional lives are paved with discipline.

In the first week of training, Rahima Jahan, head of the project and skilled bargainer, set an obstacle course for the trainees. They were sent to Nurjahan Market with a list of 8 clothing items and a budget of Tk 2,000 only. The stakes were high as the aspiring diplomats would have to face extreme heat, narrow alleys and of course, getting lost in a maze of rejected, affordable clothes.

In order to raise the stakes, Rahima also pitted a small team of aunties against the young diplomats, with the winner being whichever group finishes first.

As the head blew her whistle, the diplomats scrambled between the rows. Some of them got pushed around between the rows of people so much that they lost the list.

One of the diplomats found a shirt that matched the one on their list. When the seller said he'd let go of the shirt for Tk 500 at a loss, and that it is an "A1 copy" of the original Mawks & Spendsir shirt, they thought they got a great deal.

"I think Rahima would really appreciate this steal!" said Harun. But Rahima, who was watching through the secret bodycam set up on the participants' shoulders, did not appreciate the "steal".

 "Tk 500 for a cotton shirt and he calls it a steal? More like a scam! I would've offered him Tk 300 and walked," Rahima said, adding disappointedly, "I guess it's a good day for the vendors."

By the time the two-hour drill was over, the diplomats lost for an obvious lack of skill. And commander Rahima wasn't the least surprised.

"So, ladies and gentlemen, what have we learnt from today's drill?" said Rahima, walking across all the diplomats back at the training centre.

"That we should always keep our lists on our phones?" whimpered the diplomat who lost his list.

 "WRONG, next!"

"That we should always offer to pay half the price stated by the vendor and then offer increments of Tk 50 to make them feel like they're winning," said Selina, who seemed to be getting the hang of it faster than the others.

"Brilliant! Who said that?" inquired Rahima.

 "Me, ma'am," Selina said, slowly raising her hand.

 "Good, good. And what do you do if he still doesn't agree?"

 "You walk away," chimed the class in a roar

 "Now, we're talking."