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Obsessed with rainbows, ex-faculty member slapped with restraining order

Photo: Jordan McDonald

When the former part-time lecturer of Crack University was let go last year for his discriminatory language and actions, he was at a loss. Why had the university dismissed him for tearing up a book as an educator?

The former lecturer, Jeno IPad, believed that after enduring countless student assignments checked with ChatGPT and the apparent laziness of his students, his position gave him the unique opportunity to lead a movement against his profound hatred for rainbows.

Alas, since his aversion to rainbows was fascist and discriminatory towards those who accepted and loved them, he had been terminated.

Since then, Jeno has made it his life's mission to rally people against rainbows and, indirectly, Crack University for making him unemployed. He began scouring for incriminating evidence against the university, wherever he could find traces of the rainbow.

He started defacing university promotional flyers featuring multi-coloured kites and targeting students who adored wearing chrome eyeshadows simply because they loved bright colors. His particular disdain for tie-dyes was initially eyebrow-raising and confusing, but this correspondent soon realised that it was the vivid colour combinations that provoked his hatred.

Yet, his ultimate goal was to gather support against Crack University, against all odds.

One of his followers reported that they had taken to boycotting rainbows in the sky by refusing to go outside after it rains. This was especially difficult for the protesters, given that Dhaka receives 1,854 millimeters of rain on average, but their resolve was admirable.

"We don't understand why Jeno Ipad just can't get therapy. We're getting concerned about his obsession with us. It's like he's going through a really bad breakup. We're planning to issue a restraining order because of his fixation on the university," said a teaching staff member at Crack University.

Meanwhile, after extensive investigation, this correspondent spoke with Jeno's doctor, who revealed that he suffers from microcephaly, a brain development disorder, which prevents him from accepting all colors in the same frame.

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Obsessed with rainbows, ex-faculty member slapped with restraining order

Photo: Jordan McDonald

When the former part-time lecturer of Crack University was let go last year for his discriminatory language and actions, he was at a loss. Why had the university dismissed him for tearing up a book as an educator?

The former lecturer, Jeno IPad, believed that after enduring countless student assignments checked with ChatGPT and the apparent laziness of his students, his position gave him the unique opportunity to lead a movement against his profound hatred for rainbows.

Alas, since his aversion to rainbows was fascist and discriminatory towards those who accepted and loved them, he had been terminated.

Since then, Jeno has made it his life's mission to rally people against rainbows and, indirectly, Crack University for making him unemployed. He began scouring for incriminating evidence against the university, wherever he could find traces of the rainbow.

He started defacing university promotional flyers featuring multi-coloured kites and targeting students who adored wearing chrome eyeshadows simply because they loved bright colors. His particular disdain for tie-dyes was initially eyebrow-raising and confusing, but this correspondent soon realised that it was the vivid colour combinations that provoked his hatred.

Yet, his ultimate goal was to gather support against Crack University, against all odds.

One of his followers reported that they had taken to boycotting rainbows in the sky by refusing to go outside after it rains. This was especially difficult for the protesters, given that Dhaka receives 1,854 millimeters of rain on average, but their resolve was admirable.

"We don't understand why Jeno Ipad just can't get therapy. We're getting concerned about his obsession with us. It's like he's going through a really bad breakup. We're planning to issue a restraining order because of his fixation on the university," said a teaching staff member at Crack University.

Meanwhile, after extensive investigation, this correspondent spoke with Jeno's doctor, who revealed that he suffers from microcephaly, a brain development disorder, which prevents him from accepting all colors in the same frame.

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কেরানীগঞ্জে ব্যাংকে ডাকাত, ঘিরে রেখেছে পুলিশ-জনতা

চুনকুটিয়া এলাকায় রূপালী ব্যাংকে ডাকাত প্রবেশ করলে স্থানীয়রা জড়ো হয়ে ব্যাংকে বাইরে থেকে তালা ঝুলিয়ে দেন। খবর পেয়ে পুলিশ ও অন্যান্য আইনশৃঙ্খলা বাহিনীর সদস্যরা সেখানে যান।

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