We want Bangladeshi refs for 2026: FIFA

In a recent and shocking move, Fifa has chosen to recruit regular, non-footballing Bangladeshis as referees for the next World Cup, after being blown away by their intense and almost unbeatable knowledge of the game.

It had also thought of adding the word Bangladesh to their name -- Fédération Internationale de Football Association – but later decided not to as it would, as Fifa officials said, "sound ridiculous".

"What would it be then? Bfifa? Fifab? Fbfa? Nothing sounded as cool as Fifa, so we're leaving it as it is," a Fifa official, preferring anonymity, told this correspondent.

In a statement issued recently, Fifa chief Gianni Infantino said, "It has come to our attention that the Bangladesh public seems to know fouls better than our current referees. Sometimes, they see fouls and penalties that are missed even by people with trained eyes, and machines too.

"The initial decision is that Brazil supporting Bangladeshis will be refereeing matches featuring Argentina and vice versa."

The federation further said the knowledge that Bangladeshis possess came to their notice after claims that Argentina paid the federation a large sum in order to win the World Cup.

"After much deliberation, we have decided to have them on board with us from next World Cup onwards so that we can put their expertise to some good use, as they currently use it to hurt each other."

 "We thought they played good enough to win. But what do we know about football? They know better," the statement read, adding, "It seems such claims were made for almost every match from the beginning of the tournament where penalties were wrong, cards handed out were wrong, all decisions were wrong."

As a matter of fact, even the VAR (Video-assistant referee) was wrong, which prompted the board to change the name of the tech to BAR (Bangladeshi assisted referee).

"After much deliberation, we have decided to have them on board with us from next World Cup onwards so that we can put their expertise to some good use, as they currently use it to hurt each other."

The Bangladesh authorities, as expected, are yet to make a response in this regard. Insiders have said they are "over the moon" to be finally noticed as a great football-knowledge nation.

However, they added they would take their time in responding, albeit positively, just to show that they have the upper hand and don't really care much.