5 Kinds of People in a Facebook Group

The following are the five kinds of people I see lurking in Facebook groups. Try steering clear of them.

The Repost Guy
This person will repeatedly post links to stuff that have already been posted on the group before. Sometimes he'll repost his own link because that's who he is. I once tried doing this, but the repost guy in my group requested me not to steal his thunder, and I listened to him the first time because I didn't want him to repeat himself.

The Essayist
This person has the amazing ability to write a 500 word comment with terrible grammar on any given post. He might not even bother reading your post to see what it is about. His essay will be ready within 10 minutes, enlightening you on how you are wrong about everything in your life and that this essay will save you from moral ineptitude and the pathetic life you no doubt have. 

The Guy Who Has a New Online Shop and Wants You to Buy Stuff from Him
These people need to understand that there's a time and place for everything. They can't possibly join a Filipino Ariana Grande Fan Club and expect people to buy their handmade bookmarkers made from tissues and glue. Posting ads on those places is pointless.

The “Add Me Gurls” Guy
They sprout out of everywhere. From dubious news sites to the blogs of East Asian teenagers, you will find them proclaiming “add me ;)” religiously in the comments section. I don't see much of them in Facebook groups nowadays, but that's mostly because I've acquired a little self-respect and left all the so called “entertaining” groups. 

That One Person Who Will Comment “F” On Every Post
Usually when one thinks a particular discussion is interesting and that s/he should “follow” it, they write “F” on the comment so that they might get notified when other people comment on it. But there will always be that person who'd write “F” on every single post because nobody likes or comments in his stuff and he needs notifications to save himself from all the loneliness. 

There's also the guy who thinks he can have a relevant discussion in a group, but that kind is slowly being driven to extinction. Let's not count them. 

Rafee Shaams is an amalgam personality, an accretion of various sub-personas, identities that are individual facets of a great jewel mind whose various facets exist beyond normal three-dimensional space and can only be perceived by children and the insane. He can be reached at rafeeshaams@gmail.com