Dear Team Partner, 

It has been long since you graced our project with your participation. I'm afraid it yearns for you very badly and its condition is deteriorating with every passing day. I can only give it so much company and then I have to move on with my life. I suppose it is the intoxicating smell of your lavender perfume and your harmonious giggle every time I make a mistake while you stand and watch me that it longs for. Maybe you could visit us sometime.

See, I know you are wading through troubled waters. Perfect hair days only punctuate your weeks now and the cherry flavoured lipgloss is scarce in the market because not many people could afford it. Word has also reached my ears that you got into a hitch with your boyfriend because he thought your so-called little feet were not little enough, and that he is coming to see you tonight and you are tearing apart the countable number of neurones in your brain, trying to fathom how to make your feet look small. I am as concerned for you as you are about your feet.

But my bigger concern is that this project is supposed to be group work. And according to Oxford Dictionary, which I am confident you have not heard of but it is okay because you are pretty, group work means  'work done by a group of people working together.' Since the other members of the group were incapable of standing your presence (their loss, right?) and left, it is just you and I and it would really be helpful if you showed up.

There is obviously no doubt that you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth and you can manage a spot in any renowned university because your father has 'contacts.' But I was born with no such fortune, and I have to burn the midnight oil and toil for hours to secure a decent future for me.  In order to do so, I need to get a big, fat scholarship which in turn, depends on this project as it can really beef up my application. Please try to wrap your head around the fact that this really is my last straw before college is over.  Wait, was this paragraph too 'idiom-y' for you? Oxford Dictionary would help.

So as you can understand (I'm assuming you do), I have to bag an A+ on this project and I literally cannot afford to lose the marks behind group effort. I know what you are thinking, but Team Partner, I do not have silken locks and a wobbly chin and big green eyes that well up at the slightest hint of rudeness, so it is impossible for me to have my way with the professors. My eyes are dry and  have sunken into deep pits from all the sleepless nights I have been spending behind this project so please, for God's sake, bathe me in the divine light of your presence and show up as soon as possible.

Sincerely,
Your very frustrated team partner.

P.S. Your boyfriend is right. You have humongous feet.