The view up here ain't that great

Being a 5' 6" girl in a country where the average height of women is 4' 1" is not as glamorous as it may seem. 

Jamai paowa jabe na

At every dawaat, you'll have one very distant aunt or uncle distraught over finding a suitable groom of your altitude. Indeed fupi, I'll stop growing taller. In fact, let me just throw myself into a dryer and hope to come back a couple of inches shorter by tomorrow, because apparently I'm a sweater who can do that!

Betrayal of clothes 

Every outfit is an awkward size that kills its style. In lazy days, you'd want to wear a maxi dress to avoid shaving your legs. Yet instead of being floor-touching like maxi dresses oath to be, they hang above and keep a generous portion of your hairy ankles exposed. For once it'd be nice to find regular jeans that aren't Capri pants. Every t-shirt in the women's section turn into a crop top your mother frowns upon, and you'll be resorting to the men's section in pursuit of proper-fitting cloths. Then you'd be hearing, "Apu, female section-ta right e". I know, Miss Shop-assistant, I know. 

The headless horseman

Ah, gotta cherish the times you feel like the headless horseman because any part of your physique above the neck will not make the group picture. If you are determined to flash your new haircut in said picture, enjoy doing that awkward knee bend. Your mounting height brands you as the official selfie-taker. For once it'd nice to be in the back and not have my face look fatter, thanks.

The space issue

Nobody fears long journeys like tall people do because stuffing yourself in the car space that isn't made for your size is an ordeal of the most gruesome kind. Those discriminating car/bus/aeroplane seat manufacturers are probably to be blamed for your awful back pain.

Age misconceptions 

To wear a saree or not to wear a saree, that is the question. It's not rare for some aunty at the wedding to approach you asking, "Kon year e poro ma?" And you're with your biryani stuffed mouth like, "Sixth grade". Tall girls receive proposals from 30 year-old men from the age of 15, because some distant relative saw them clad in a saree at their mama's holud and got the wrong idea.

Answering absurd questions

Yes I really am that tall. No, I don't play basketball. Whether my parents are tall or not, my genealogy is none of your business. Yes I will get that hard-to-reach cookie jar for you. Oh I get clothes from this top-secret highly confidential place called the mall. Yes I will take little steps so you can catch up. The weather up here is the same as it is a foot below, reeking of your annoyingness. 

After a long day of dealing with all those inches you just want to go home and take a long hot bath. Then you figure the bathtub isn't big enough to fit you and your legs awkwardly hang out. The struggle doesn't end.

Samin Sabah Islam is on a quest to find the perfect diet while simultaneously drooling over pizza. Throw her some tips at [email protected]