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Dangers of obsessing over prestigious universities

Person with their hands on their head, visibly stressed.
Photo: Sheikh Mehedi Morshed

In our last school years, alongside the all-out parties and crying hysterically over separating from all our friends, most of us are making plans of attending our dream universities. And for many of us going abroad, we have our eyes set on the most "prestigious" and reputable of them all. However, it might be worth examining whether attending these are really our dreams, or someone else's. 

Attending the biggest universities is glorified a lot and made out to be something really important by parents, teachers, as well as peers. Frequently, our obsessions with Ivy Leagues and other top-ranked universities are projected onto us. It's often the lives our parents envision for us, as opposed to the lives we want to lead. The status surrounding these universities bewitches not just parents, but also our classmates. When we hear about all the people striving to attend these schools, we also begin to crave the respect and admiration that comes with going there. We crave the opportunities everyone says they provide.

However, what we don't realise is the sheer cost of pursuing such a merciless academic path. People who are genuinely passionate about it develop a rigorous work ethic for grades while building a student profile full of other accolades and projects outside school. This often involves sacrificing a social life, spending meaningful time with friends, or going to functions to let loose. When someone inherits these lofty ambitions without thinking it through, doing all this work can be twice as draining because you're working towards a goal with half-baked motivation. It's difficult to be very enthusiastic about an aim that your parents and half-extended family picked out for you. 

When we're focused on an objective like this for a long time, we can develop tunnel vision, hinging our self-worth on the payoff. We have a tendency to tie our intellectual ability to academic results. A small number of people get picked for the top-ranked universities, and it can be absolutely crushing to receive a rejection letter. It can lead to feelings of inadequacy, thinking of ourselves as stupid or slow for failing despite our best efforts, while not realising that it might've actually not been your best effort since your heart wasn't fully in it.

Even after one makes it to one of these top-rated universities, the hardship isn't over. These are extremely competitive environments where the best of the best gather to compete. An inability to cope at a higher standard often results in poorer grades in university which torpedoes self-esteem. Let's not forget the burnout, either. For many, it's just a way to speed-run the obliteration of their mental health.

While there's nothing wrong with aiming high and being ambitious, it's important that those ambitions be our own. A lot of us don't have the luxury of choice. In a somewhat malicious way, some elders impose these goals on us through emotional abuse, seeking vicarious gratification. It doesn't help that everyone romanticises being admitted to prestigious universities in the first place. Even with these obstacles, for our own sake, it's important to consider if we're really built for a life of constantly battling for academic glory and if we'll be happy trading so much to attend these institutions. Easing expectations and acknowledging our limitations will help us deal with rejection less painfully. So, before scrolling through the QS university rankings, ask yourself this question: is this for you?

Rishi's chronic procrastination is ruining his life. Send him more things to procrastinate with at: reeshe46321@gmail.com

Comments

Dangers of obsessing over prestigious universities

Person with their hands on their head, visibly stressed.
Photo: Sheikh Mehedi Morshed

In our last school years, alongside the all-out parties and crying hysterically over separating from all our friends, most of us are making plans of attending our dream universities. And for many of us going abroad, we have our eyes set on the most "prestigious" and reputable of them all. However, it might be worth examining whether attending these are really our dreams, or someone else's. 

Attending the biggest universities is glorified a lot and made out to be something really important by parents, teachers, as well as peers. Frequently, our obsessions with Ivy Leagues and other top-ranked universities are projected onto us. It's often the lives our parents envision for us, as opposed to the lives we want to lead. The status surrounding these universities bewitches not just parents, but also our classmates. When we hear about all the people striving to attend these schools, we also begin to crave the respect and admiration that comes with going there. We crave the opportunities everyone says they provide.

However, what we don't realise is the sheer cost of pursuing such a merciless academic path. People who are genuinely passionate about it develop a rigorous work ethic for grades while building a student profile full of other accolades and projects outside school. This often involves sacrificing a social life, spending meaningful time with friends, or going to functions to let loose. When someone inherits these lofty ambitions without thinking it through, doing all this work can be twice as draining because you're working towards a goal with half-baked motivation. It's difficult to be very enthusiastic about an aim that your parents and half-extended family picked out for you. 

When we're focused on an objective like this for a long time, we can develop tunnel vision, hinging our self-worth on the payoff. We have a tendency to tie our intellectual ability to academic results. A small number of people get picked for the top-ranked universities, and it can be absolutely crushing to receive a rejection letter. It can lead to feelings of inadequacy, thinking of ourselves as stupid or slow for failing despite our best efforts, while not realising that it might've actually not been your best effort since your heart wasn't fully in it.

Even after one makes it to one of these top-rated universities, the hardship isn't over. These are extremely competitive environments where the best of the best gather to compete. An inability to cope at a higher standard often results in poorer grades in university which torpedoes self-esteem. Let's not forget the burnout, either. For many, it's just a way to speed-run the obliteration of their mental health.

While there's nothing wrong with aiming high and being ambitious, it's important that those ambitions be our own. A lot of us don't have the luxury of choice. In a somewhat malicious way, some elders impose these goals on us through emotional abuse, seeking vicarious gratification. It doesn't help that everyone romanticises being admitted to prestigious universities in the first place. Even with these obstacles, for our own sake, it's important to consider if we're really built for a life of constantly battling for academic glory and if we'll be happy trading so much to attend these institutions. Easing expectations and acknowledging our limitations will help us deal with rejection less painfully. So, before scrolling through the QS university rankings, ask yourself this question: is this for you?

Rishi's chronic procrastination is ruining his life. Send him more things to procrastinate with at: reeshe46321@gmail.com

Comments