New Fast and Furious movie to feature Bangladeshi highway buses

The Fast and Furious franchise is well known for its fast cars, over-the-top stunts, reckless driving and a lot of car crashes. If there's anything that fits this description the best and is worthy of being a part of the franchise, it's buses on a Bangladeshi highway. Reports suggest that in the next movie of the Fast and Furious franchise featuring 8 bald guys for the umpteenth time, the makers want to feature Bangladeshi highway buses, as they're the epitome of something fast and equally furious.  

"I got the call from the producers at around 2 AM last night," said Vin Petrol, a driver for Hena Transport Pvt. Ltd., who got offered the job.

"I was on the Dhaka-Mymensingh highway, driving a bus at 100 mph on a foggy winter night. Naturally, I did what any highway bus driver in Bangladesh would do in a scenario like this – I picked up the call and started talking on the phone while driving. The passengers were screaming at the top of their lungs and begging me to slow down. In life, there are always going to be haters who'd want to slow you down. My spiritual guru, a social media influencer himself, taught me never to pay heed to the haters and keep doing what I do best. And so, I overspeed," he said.

"After listening to their offer, I was overwhelmed. All the stunts that I do on the highway are mostly inspired by Fast and Furious movies," continued Vin Petrol. "Except that they use VFX for their stunts and I'm more of a Tom Cruise kind of guy. I like to do all my stunts myself, even if it means I might risk my passengers' safety. Such is my dedication towards this art form. I got so excited by the call that I immediately got off the driver's seat and let my underage helper drive a bus carrying 53 passengers and three goats. What are the cops going to do? Seize his licence? HAH! He doesn't have a licence!"

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However, Vin Petrol, along with other drivers of Hena Transport Pvt. Ltd., have been heavily criticised for their over-speeding tendencies. 

"Firstly, our slogan literally says – "My Way or Sky Way". No long-haul journey is overnight in Bangladesh if you're fast enough! If time is money, I'm actually helping my passengers save a lot of money by driving at 100 mph and trust me, in this economy, you're going to need your savings. Secondly, all of my passengers, irrespective of their belief or the lack of it, can't help but pray to God when I'm in the driver's seat. More prayers are recorded per hour on a Hena bus than on a Friday before lunch. I'm doing God's work out here and I deserve some recognition for it," Vin complained.

One of the executive producers of the Fast and Furious franchise told the press, "With each sequel, we face the challenge of coming up with a crazier stunt than before. But we've reached saturation after so many movies and there are no laws of physics left for us to break. So, it's time to pull out the big guns because nothing gets crazier and more dangerous than the way Bangladeshi bus drivers drive public transport."

"Except for the bikers, of course," he concluded.

Remind Ifti to be quieter at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com