The art of voicing opinions nobody asked for

Humans are opinionated beings. When presented with any situation, most of us will form an opinion. The tragedy of the world however, is that sometimes our opinions are unnecessary – maybe even unwelcome. That doesn't hinder us from having our own viewpoints though.

Sure, you can always visit the group chat and rant to your three friends, but being cooped up in that echo chamber would mean missing out on the Socratic euphoria of educating strangers on the street. If you're faced with this dilemma often, then fear not, we have devised a foolproof way you can share your unsolicited input with the world without any holdups.

Rid yourself of self-awareness 

Are you perhaps judging someone for being guilty of something you yourself have done in the past? Do you hold double standards about the situation? Throw it all away, it will only slow you down.

Did that one person on your Facebook post a review of a film they've recently enjoyed, which, according to your personal taste, is puerile and overrated? You are a hundred percent entitled to talk down to them. So what if you're just an average joe? You've watched Pulp Fiction and Fight Club about twenty times now. Certainly you have a sophisticated, obscure taste in films compared to that loser watching superhero movies.  

Buzzwords

Maybe you're not the type that can express themselves persuasively. That's normal. The majority of us face the same issue. Now, to tackle this situation, you can try expanding your vocabulary. That process will take you a while, so here's a quick shortcut to being more convincing in defending your opinions – buzzwords.

To defuse any counterargument, try to add an "ism" at the end of completely regular words to add a little razzle-dazzle. My personal suggestion would be using "whataboutism" anytime you're caught guilty of double standards. The way to successfully implement buzzwords into your arguments is throwing a bunch of them at a time really fast, which will automatically gaslight your opponent into thinking these are common words anyone should know.

The convolution theorem

If your expression of opinions is not in a verbal setting, then you have the edge. Hit Thesaurus on every other word. Don't worry about the proper applications of the convoluted words though. The average Homo sapien won't be able to parry the obstacle that your sesquipedalian glory will manifest.

Take up writing

Proclaim that writing is your passion. It doesn't matter whether you have a platform, go ahead and share that 1500-word status update that will exceed an HSC candidate's Bangla 2nd Paper essay in terms of length. If you can cement your reputation as a writer, you'll find that your opinions are being given more value than that of the layman's.

Never admit that you're wrong

Don't be afraid to resort to personal insults if your opinion isn't well-received. Being able to successfully play the part of a victim also works in a stellar way. If an argument ensues and you're left feeling unsatisfied, consider posting a picture of Tywin Lannister with the caption "The lion doesn't concern itself with the opinion of the sheep" right afterwards.

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