The race for Marvel movie tickets

"I saw the ticket. Hallelujah! 'Twas shining. Glowing, it was!" screamed the mad old man.

We stared as the guards pulled him away. "Don't believe a word he said. I've been standing here for six days, nobody saw a ticket," whimpered a man at the front. "But they say when the old man first came, he was only 21. He's been here since the very beginning," said one from the back. We all fell quiet. Was it possible? Had the old man really seen a ticket for Spiderman: Homeless?

I've been standing in front of CineFlex for four days now. I probably won't get a ticket coming in this late but they cuffed our hands and legs the moment we stepped foot, so the only way out is through. The last time a Marvel movie sailed across the Atlantic, Bangladesh became a meme template on Reddit. But with Marvel running out of ideas to extort the masses and Kevin Feige pulling out the nostalgia card on millennials each year, the stakes are the highest now.

Gone are the days of Bitcoin. My mother's words still hurt, "Your cousin's a millionaire now after mining Marvel movie tickets online! And here you are, writing your worthless PhD thesis paper!"

Even outside the theatre, smugglers were selling tickets 50 times the price. Making money off basic rights like education and healthcare – I comply! But Marvel movie tickets? Capitalising on the most animalistic impulses of people, how low can humanity stoop to?

It was the human Bijoy Sarani traffic jam. After three more days, the gates of Heaven opened and we went inside. Someone lost his family in the crowd, others their friends. But there was no looking back, not even for your loved ones. Someone held their dying friend in his arms, "Have y'all no heart left in you? Can't you spare one single ticket for this dying soul? Even 2D would do!"

The dying man blurted out with all his strength, "I mean, 3D would be more preferable, though. The colours are more vibrant and with Dolby Atmos..." With one last outcry, his friend shut his mouth forcefully and choked him to death.

"I can't believe we are dumb enough to fall for these money-making baits. Standing in line for weeks for green screen theme park movies as real cinema dies? Pathetic," said a guy while folding up his tent.

Just then, the counter opened. The salesmen stood on the counter and threw tickets into the howling crowd at random. If someone was lucky enough to catch hold of one, others around him would jump at him, scratching, biting and eating his flesh off. As I stood in one corner, I saw a gladiator rise from the pile of bodies with a blood ticket in his hands. Crying in disbelief, his people hugged him tightly.

Suddenly, a ticket came flying in my direction. With it, some bloodthirsty eyes. A scream in the distance, my entire life flashing before my eyes.

Ah Capitalism, thou sadistic witch!

Remind Ifti to be quieter at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com