Me And My Heroes

Ever since I had those butterflies fluttering in my heart, I have been a member of OSLA (One Sided Lovers' Association). My one sided love affairs are with actors on the screens.

I was sweet-sixteen when Waheed Murad, the Pakistani actor became my hero. His handsome face under the thick black hair took my breath away.

In the early '70s, The Persuaders, an action/adventure TV series was a must watch for me. Roger Moore was the first foreign actor to capture my heart from that show. He had dark hair, was sweet and at the same time very manly. How I loved the way he raced his car with complete confidence, his blue eyes.

In the late '70s my mother took me to watch “The Guns of Navarone”, with Gregory Peck in the lead role. The occasion was my star-crossed love to be found. Gregory Peck with his incredibly good looks and bravery sealed my heart with undying love.

Then, along came Uttam Kumar in my invisible love life. After watching “Haraano Suur”, Uttam Kumar began talking to me in my dreams. In the movies, he spoke Bangla, my native tongue. While watching his movies I would imagine myself as Suchitra Sen.

Western movies with cowboys found a fresh place in my heart's lonely hunts. Blue eyed cowboys with their sombreros became my dance partners in barn dances. The age of forties found me deeply in love with Bollywood actors. Amitabh Bachchan and Rajesh Khanna were my mantras after we got our first VCR and watched endless Hindi movies.

Even now, as a member of OSLA, after aging more than half a century, watching “Unfaithful” has me fall for Richard Gere. To me, if being unfaithful meant having Richard Gere share a cup of coffee with me, that would be worth the risk. And to this day, I do not watch movies by Pierce Brosnan without having my wild imagination fly to a planet where he and I would be the only inhabitants.

If only all my cinema heroes knew of how a young girl has grown old with hopeless love for them, perhaps one of them would become real in my life when I make a wish with the shooting stars.