Off Campus
Satire

BBA student gets married, calls it the best networking experience of his life

Design: Abir Hossain

If there's anything that makes a BBA student in Dhaka happier than doing their assignments in overpriced coffee shops, it's a good networking opportunity. After all, nothing is impossible – if you believe in your ability to make the right connections, that is.

While swapping out most definitions of interpersonal relationships for the umbrella term "networking" is not uncommon amidst students of this cutthroat stream, Sakeeb Hossain took it to a whole new level when he dubbed his own matrimonial proceedings as such.

"I have always looked down on my classmates who settled down before me, and thought that they were unambitious and too emotionally driven. But really, they were two steps ahead of me the whole time. If you take a moment to think about it, a wedding reception is nothing but a large-scale networking event where people actually want to network with you," Sakeeb said.

Rafiq Ahmed, Sakeeb's friend and classmate, is less enthusiastic about the groom's business-minded outlook. He lamented, "Look, I'm a BBA student too and I appreciate the lucrative opportunity of chatting up that one gullible uncle with money to waste on whatever tired startup vision we have, but Sakeeb takes it way too far. I helped the decorators set up the stage for his holud and he's been introducing me as his Chief Logistics Officer ever since."

When asked if his attempts have borne fruit, Sakeeb enthusiastically explains that he has not only been able to foster meaningful potential professional relationships, but the reception has also been an incredible success in crowdfunding. "My rich uncle laughed at me when I pitched my startup, but he didn't hesitate to drop generous amounts on my wedding gift. And really, what is marriage but starting up your lives together?"

When asked about the bride's opinion on him treating their marriage like a professional partnership, he explained, "I think any young woman with an entrepreneurial mindset would be able to appreciate this as a smart ROI (return on investment) for all the wedding expenses."

Upon taking a moment to think about it, he adds, "Besides, it's really no big loss if she chooses to divorce me over this. A second wedding means a fresh batch of connections waiting to be made, and money to be raised for a brand-new startup."

Comments

Satire

BBA student gets married, calls it the best networking experience of his life

Design: Abir Hossain

If there's anything that makes a BBA student in Dhaka happier than doing their assignments in overpriced coffee shops, it's a good networking opportunity. After all, nothing is impossible – if you believe in your ability to make the right connections, that is.

While swapping out most definitions of interpersonal relationships for the umbrella term "networking" is not uncommon amidst students of this cutthroat stream, Sakeeb Hossain took it to a whole new level when he dubbed his own matrimonial proceedings as such.

"I have always looked down on my classmates who settled down before me, and thought that they were unambitious and too emotionally driven. But really, they were two steps ahead of me the whole time. If you take a moment to think about it, a wedding reception is nothing but a large-scale networking event where people actually want to network with you," Sakeeb said.

Rafiq Ahmed, Sakeeb's friend and classmate, is less enthusiastic about the groom's business-minded outlook. He lamented, "Look, I'm a BBA student too and I appreciate the lucrative opportunity of chatting up that one gullible uncle with money to waste on whatever tired startup vision we have, but Sakeeb takes it way too far. I helped the decorators set up the stage for his holud and he's been introducing me as his Chief Logistics Officer ever since."

When asked if his attempts have borne fruit, Sakeeb enthusiastically explains that he has not only been able to foster meaningful potential professional relationships, but the reception has also been an incredible success in crowdfunding. "My rich uncle laughed at me when I pitched my startup, but he didn't hesitate to drop generous amounts on my wedding gift. And really, what is marriage but starting up your lives together?"

When asked about the bride's opinion on him treating their marriage like a professional partnership, he explained, "I think any young woman with an entrepreneurial mindset would be able to appreciate this as a smart ROI (return on investment) for all the wedding expenses."

Upon taking a moment to think about it, he adds, "Besides, it's really no big loss if she chooses to divorce me over this. A second wedding means a fresh batch of connections waiting to be made, and money to be raised for a brand-new startup."

Comments

মূল্যস্ফীতি

উচ্চ মূল্যস্ফীতির মধ্যেও বড় বাজেট

সরকার আগামী অর্থবছরের জন্য আট লাখ ৪৮ হাজার কোটি টাকার বাজেট পরিকল্পনা করছে, যা চলতি অর্থবছরের বাজেটের চেয়ে ৬ দশমিক ৩ শতাংশ বেশি।

৫৬ মিনিট আগে