Easily the most pervasive feeling that plagues mothers around the world, "mum guilt" usually stems from the belief that they are not doing enough for their children. It can be emotionally exhausting, impacting not only their mental health but also their overall well-being. Fortunately, with the right strategies, it is possible to help mothers eventually overcome this guilt and embrace a more balanced and fulfilling life.

Here's how:

Acknowledge and validate your feelings

The first step to addressing mum guilt is to acknowledge that you are suffering from it. Recognising that these feelings are common can provide a sense of relief. Talking about your feelings with trusted friends, family members, or a therapist and generally expressing these emotions out loud can help you process them and help you understand that you are not alone.

Set realistic expectations

One of the main contributors to mum guilt is the unrealistic expectations set by society and even personal standards. It is crucial to recognise that perfection is unattainable and that doing your best is enough. Give yourself grace when you make mistakes and celebrate small victories and progress, rather than fixating on perceived shortcomings.

Prioritise self-care

Self-care is often overlooked by mothers who feel guilty about taking time out for themselves. However, self-care is not selfish; it is essential for maintaining your well-being and ability to care for your family. Make time for activities that rejuvenate you — whether it's reading, exercising, or spending time with friends.

Remember, a happy and healthy mother is better equipped to take care of her children.

Delegate and seek support

Many mothers feel they must handle everything on their own, leading to burnout and increased guilt when things do not go as expected. Learning to delegate tasks and seek support from your partner, family, or friends can significantly lighten your load.

Do not be afraid to ask for help with childcare, household chores, or other responsibilities. Building a support system is crucial for maintaining balance.

Embrace flexibility

Life with children is unpredictable, and rigidity can exacerbate feelings of guilt when things do not go as planned. Embrace flexibility and adaptability in your daily routine. Understand that it is okay to change plans and that flexibility does not equate to failure. Being adaptable allows you to navigate the ups and downs of parenting with greater ease.

Practice mindfulness and gratitude

Incorporating mindfulness practices into your daily routine can help you stay in the moment and reduce anxiety. Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or journaling can help you manage stress and gain perspective. Practising gratitude can help shift your focus from what you are lacking to appreciating what you have. Reflect on the positive aspects of your life and your parenting journey.

Focus on quality, not quantity

The quality of time spent with your children is more important than the quantity. Engaging in meaningful activities and being fully present with them during your interactions can strengthen your bond with your children and alleviate guilt. Remember that short, focused periods of connection can be more impactful than long hours filled with distractions.

Forgive yourself

Finally, practice self-forgiveness. Let go of past mistakes and the guilt associated with them. Understand that every mother faces challenges and that learning from these experiences is part of the journey. Treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion you would offer a friend in a similar situation.