When Dhaka Stands Still

If you have never had to travel in Dhaka after a (not so) heavy shower, I envy your life. The purpose of this article is to tell you what happens if you dare to go to Dhanmondi from Motijheel on such a day.

6:00pm, Motijheel
If I'm lucky, I might be home by 7:15. The radio's on and if we manage to cross Kakrail within the next 15 minutes, an hour should pass easily.

6:15pm, almost Paltan
I don't think we have moved over a 100 yards and I'm being optimistic. But it's not too bad. I could have been standing in a bus whose inside smells like onions and is more crowded than a Pahela Baishakh rally. 

The beggars seem very disappointed. They've already asked us a few times and have realised they need a new batch of vehicles and people to make more money. It does not seem like that'll be happening any time soon.

6:45pm, Kakrail
We've stopped again. Maybe if I take a short nap, we'll have reached Science Lab by the time I've woken up, or better yet, home.

7:15pm, still Kakrail
A loud but indistinct scream woke me up and the first thing I blurt out is "Are we there yet?" Nope. Haven't moved an inch. The commotion, turns out, was coming from the two buses next to us. Apparently, one of them brushed against the other and now the drivers were saying all sorts of unprintable things about each other's ancestors. With these, came terrifying threats of what one would do if the other manned up and came out of his bus. However, neither showed any signs of doing that.

7:30pm, Motshyo Bhobon
WHY ISN'T SHE SHUTTING UP AND PLAYING MUSIC? No one cares about your day, woman. I tuned in to listen to music; I have better qualified sources to get moral lessons from. And what is it with the people texting her? 
There were at least five people saying, "Apu, you have a beautiful voice." Yeah, that was kind of a job requirement, idiots.
I jab my finger at the off button when she starts replying to the ones that asked for relationship advice. I've had enough.

8:00pm, Shishu Park
Exhausted.
Starving.
Broke.
Approximate distance from destination: Multiple light years.

8:30pm, Shahbagh
I'm positive that the traffic police forgot about us. That can be the only explanation. 

8:45pm, Elephant Road
Whoah, that was fast. We hit 40kmph when the Shahbagh signal cleared and I feel dizzy. It's all very exciting.

9:10pm, Science Lab
Did we just stop AGAIN? You know that feeling when you concede a goal at the 90th minute when you're playing Fifa? That is exactly what I feel now.

9:35pm, Dhanmondi
This is something I never thought I'd say.
I'M HOME.

Kidwa Arif tries to write fiction and fails miserably. You can reach him at arif.kidwa@yahoo.com