Ultra woke teenager cancels herself and her clout-based services in new rant

An ultra-woke teenager, who spent most of her days virtue-signaling and offering clout-based services to her clients, yesterday cancelled herself in a sign of reaching good-person Nirvana.

Sitara, who later called the cancelling "organic", said it had to be done as she herself had crossed the line.

The resident of Mirpur district left her fives of fans shocked when her rant against something superficial devolved into bullying those who went against her newfound beliefs on something trivial. She initially tried to force feed her ideas to her followers, but when a few resisted, she resorted to personally attacking them.

Later, when public opinion began to sway against her, she quickly deactivated her social media account.

To her credit, Sitara did not once try to claim she was hacked. She also did not follow up with a movie that could have whitewashed her now-tainted stardom, nor did she post anything edgy.

Sitara would later make her comeback to social media with a template-fitted apology post. "I am such a terrible person for having such ill-informed opinions. I need to be cancelled for instigating others to make fun of those with a different belief system than mine. Actually, I had just seen a short video on my new belief and read a few curt quotes, so I did not even know what it was that I was representing," she said.

Sitara wasn't the first to find herself in such self-inflicted hot waters. Lately many people have been calling themselves out for their half-baked opinions in viral tirades against themselves.

"Blaming yourself is the new viral sensation. It signifies that your virtue is on such a high pedestal that even you yourself can't reach it," Mehdi Hassan, a clout-chaser, told this correspondent.

Catching up with Sitara, she said such behaviour was only to be expected. "We don't really know what we are talking about. But remember, no publicity is bad publicity. Inflammatory opinions sometimes lead to discussions, shares and can help one go viral," she said.

"Plus, you can always announce you are deactivating social media and get more reactions to build clout. These are all part of our clout-based services," she said.   She also pointed out the hypocrisy in this very article, saying this was also a not a very-subtle way of bullying her.