Woman surprised bananas have shrunk during recession

A local woman was shocked, surprised and astounded when a local shopkeeper said locally grown bananas now cost Tk 70 per ounce. It was only Tk 70 for half a dozen last week. Inflation has hit the town hard making it difficult for the folk of Lalmayshia to grab a bite with their corn flakes and high fibre, low carbohydrate muesli breakfast.  

"Sure, we used to be the middle ground of the middle class before but now that a super expensive ice cream chain called Movenpick has opened up in our neighborhood, we go toe-to-toe with tri-state neighborhoods. Did you know we have three new BMWs in one block?" asked  Mosharraf, who recently moved into the neighbourhood to compete with his colleague.

"But just because our status has gone up by 18 percent and we have clean street dogs unlike Mirpur, does it mean we have to pay ridiculous amounts for bananas," he asked angrily.

"It's not that the bananas have gone up in price. It's just that the fruits have shrunk from the effects of inflation much like the hopes and dreams of common folk."

People of the Lalmayshia neighbourhood gathered at the primary grocery store called Babul & Brothers to protest this high price of a very simple bendy fruit. Mr Brothers, the 47-year-old proprietor of the store, asked people to calm down and keep buying.

"It's not that the bananas have gone up in price. It's just that the fruits have shrunk from the effects of inflation much like the hopes and dreams of common folk," he explained.

In the meantime, he offered people the latest craze in breakfast: avocados. People relented and went about their day posting pictures of themselves eating breakfast with slices of very expensive avocado.

"I think balance has been somewhat restored as my friends living in Rajshahi called me 'rajar chele' when they saw my new breakfast staple," mentioned the local woman of Lalmayshia.

When the reporter asked the gathered people why they could not live off the simple and humble egg and parata, aka the Egg Roll, people retorted that this was no longer the staple of Lalmayshia. "We worked hard to make our neighbourhood affluent by 18 percent. Egg rolls are the stuff of poor people."