Citizens visibly shaken by ‘Visible 2021’

On January 1, 2021, Chapasthan transformed into a "utopia". Weeks have passed, but Chapasthanis are still struggling to face reality.

"I-I can't handle this much development," said Kabir Hossain, founder of a local development NGO, which vanished while he was partying on the 31st with the establishment's funds. "I was a changemaker. Now, there is no change to make. My organisation unfounded itself." 

The government has issued a gazette notification on the decision to change the country's name to "Digital Chapasthan". What seems like a sudden development was declared by the glorious government a decade ago, under its "Visible 2021" manifesto.

"Ha-ha, we told you! In your face!" said Roads and Highways Minister Omaigo Buader, while making funny faces in front of reporters. "What are you going to criticise now, losers?"

Meanwhile, BMP held a press conference, where Shamshuddin was visibly distraught. "Um, oh wow. So, like, it's a conspiracy, right?" he asked, whispering "what do we do now?" under his breath.

United Nations was like "damn" in a recent statement, congratulating Digital Chapasthan for its miraculous transformation. All of UN's organs withdrew from the country in absence of issues to tackle.

Start-ups and the 6,294 organisations that give them awards are also starting to dematerialise. With nothing to innovate, the up-and-comers are now down-and-goners.

Adnan Karim, CEO of now defunct ChickenExpress, the service that only delivered fried chicken, was seen pacing and murmuring motivational quotes.

"There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure. But answer me, how can I learn when the government's amazing social and financial safety-nets prevent me from failing? My life is over," he lamented.

IInternet Minister Goshtokha Chocbar has somehow transferred his consciousness into the internet, leaving behind his mortal body. He can now monitor every citizen's online activity in real-time. Whenever someone violates the digital guidelines, Goshtokha's face appears on the computer screen, with Soldier Boy's "youuuu" blaring out the speakers.

"This is what digitisation looks like," the minister said. "We are now prepared for the Fourth Industrial Revolution, and the fifth, and the sixth. But development is not over.

"'Visible 2041' is still ahead of us, and under that plan, all citizens will be digitised like me. We will become something akin to a primordial soup with a single consciousness, with no opposing thoughts. Glory to Digital Chapasthan," he added.