Entering the dawn of the critical woman

Kim Kardashian, Priyanka Chopra and Kangana Ranaut. These are just some women critical thinkers who were not sent to jail. The list has been cherry-picked so we can all have a laugh and by all, you know exactly who we mean. Having failed to incarcerate these women, they have inundated the world with their feminine views. At the same time, their views have wreaked havoc across all boundaries.

Let's be honest guys: the men are pissed off. 

Which brings us to the main point of this important essay: Women being critical disrupting the existing hegemony of the society. Women, right? Can't live with us, can't live without us. Regardless, we can all say that women have been called out for too long for being too critical.

The criticism aimed at us actually boils down to two very good reasons: a) that time of the month or b) bad mood. When these aren't enough, another good reason can be how bad we are at communicating, or when we said something but the male ear chose not to register it as they were busy doing their man things.

Basically, any critical analysis by any woman will eventually have to be dissected by the far superior male gaze. Only then can we make sense of what we were really thinking. Please do tell us what we meant by what we said. 

The best thing to do then on International Women's Day is not to make criticism that will not amount to anything. We also should not make any promises that we cannot keep. The male gaze will follow us no matter where we go because we are always up for scrutiny. Doing our best just isn't good enough.

You can cook, but can you cook the dish that is expected of you even without all the ingredients present? You can work, but can you also do a 9-5 at office and do the 5-12 at home? You can speak, but is your tone gentle enough? Are your words carefully thought out so as not to offend? You can wear clothes to look pleasant, but is it too pleasant?

These are all normal things to expect from the man, who runs your world and is even sweet enough to borrow money from you to buy you things. And by things, we mean that exact thing we sent them a picture of so they don't mess up with their very bad taste in all things they refuse to understand.

Much ado has been made about how men are not allowed to be critical. At this point, we must extend to them our sympathies, for we have hardly ever been allowed to be critical of anything but ourselves.

This year, let's accept that the glass ceiling does not exist. That we are no longer diversity tokens. That we can actually pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. Only if we stop criticising everything. In the end, I hope my male editor agrees to run this piece and pays me less than what an experienced man would make.

Also, if I digressed, I ask for forgiveness in advance. I will smile more often in exchange.

 Lubnan Khaleesi loves the month of March and has been rewarded with mulberries which she is willing to share.