Satire

Government employees donate 25% of salary for city’s decorations

Red lights. Green light. Then blue lights. And some yellow lights. It doesn't matter when the colours stop representing what they are meant to because we don't have enough of those colours. The fact is, the lights must go and they will because of the forced generosity of a few.

Government employees in Chapasthan's capital of Dhoka have decided to donate 25% of their monthly salary to help fund the city's decorations.

Whether the move was voluntary or not, however, has not been officially stated.

Citizens are visibly excited for the uplift with many sharing pictures of those buildings already sporting the lights.

"We just love the string lights of the same colour every year. Nothing says the country is doing great more than string lights. Think about it; everyone complains of the blackouts outside the city and sometimes in the city, but to know we can waste so much energy on making our buildings look cool brings me a lot of relief," Shaheen Islam, a citizen, said.

"It is a sign that we are indeed a country with a lot of electricity, which is great," Shaheen said while constantly looking over his shoulder.

Aftab Akhter, the minister of corruption, said, "Government employees already make a lot of money under the table. So for them to give up some of their official income is not a big deal."

Pointed out that some employees may not be making any income on the side, Aftab burst out laughing.

The city, meanwhile, is ready to wear a festive look whether anyone likes it or not. "We are not giving most of our citizens basic amenities. Some don't even have running water. We don't even have any rent control policies in place. The least we can do is give them the same boring lighting schemes on different public government buildings," a spokesperson for the Happy Citizen Standing Body said.

Contacted, a government employee on the condition of anonymity, said she was indeed very proud to be able to donate the money. "We didn't actually donate anything. They cut our wages during the Covid-19 pandemic and still haven't changed that. The buildings look nice, sure," she said.

Samiha Alam, another government officer, said she too was happy with the donations. "We. Love. The. Government. Long. Live. The. Government," she said.

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Government employees donate 25% of salary for city’s decorations

Red lights. Green light. Then blue lights. And some yellow lights. It doesn't matter when the colours stop representing what they are meant to because we don't have enough of those colours. The fact is, the lights must go and they will because of the forced generosity of a few.

Government employees in Chapasthan's capital of Dhoka have decided to donate 25% of their monthly salary to help fund the city's decorations.

Whether the move was voluntary or not, however, has not been officially stated.

Citizens are visibly excited for the uplift with many sharing pictures of those buildings already sporting the lights.

"We just love the string lights of the same colour every year. Nothing says the country is doing great more than string lights. Think about it; everyone complains of the blackouts outside the city and sometimes in the city, but to know we can waste so much energy on making our buildings look cool brings me a lot of relief," Shaheen Islam, a citizen, said.

"It is a sign that we are indeed a country with a lot of electricity, which is great," Shaheen said while constantly looking over his shoulder.

Aftab Akhter, the minister of corruption, said, "Government employees already make a lot of money under the table. So for them to give up some of their official income is not a big deal."

Pointed out that some employees may not be making any income on the side, Aftab burst out laughing.

The city, meanwhile, is ready to wear a festive look whether anyone likes it or not. "We are not giving most of our citizens basic amenities. Some don't even have running water. We don't even have any rent control policies in place. The least we can do is give them the same boring lighting schemes on different public government buildings," a spokesperson for the Happy Citizen Standing Body said.

Contacted, a government employee on the condition of anonymity, said she was indeed very proud to be able to donate the money. "We didn't actually donate anything. They cut our wages during the Covid-19 pandemic and still haven't changed that. The buildings look nice, sure," she said.

Samiha Alam, another government officer, said she too was happy with the donations. "We. Love. The. Government. Long. Live. The. Government," she said.

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চসিক

বছর না ঘুরতেই চসিকের অস্থায়ী শ্রমিক হয়ে গেলেন ‘অফিসার’

ডা. শাহাদাত হোসেন গত ৩ নভেম্বর চসিক মেয়রের দায়িত্ব নেওয়ার পর আলোচনায় উঠে আসে পাঁচ উপ-সহকারী প্রকৌশলীর অস্বাভাবিক পদোন্নতির বিষয়টি।

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