Transitions are hard at any stage of life, but for a school-going child, it can be particularly difficult. Children resist change just like adults and feel stressed about unfamiliar surroundings, the challenges of making new friends and missing the comfort of old ones. Following a few simple steps, however, can help ease your child's transition into their new school and allow parents to support them both emotionally and physically during this time.
Touring the new school together before the start of the term can help a child feel more confident on their first day. Seek the help of school authorities to arrange a tour of the most important or popular areas. This could include their new classrooms, the common library and play zone, the cafeteria and the washrooms they will be using. This will allow them to feel more self-assured when they find themselves alone on their first day.
Reema Shanta, a counsellor at a renowned English medium school in the capital, advises students, "It is only human to feel nervous in the face of change, there is no shame or cowardice in it."
A positive outlook can empower children to seize new opportunities.
Shanta suggests discussing what excites them about the new school, what uncertainties and apprehensions they have, and setting small and achievable daily goals for them. These challenges can be as easy as learning a classmate's first name, trying a new game at school, or being brave enough to ask a group of students if they can sit with them at lunch.
Teachers are aware of how a move can affect children as they often welcome new students themselves. Discuss your child's adjustment with their teacher and share any concerns you have. The school counsellor too, might have specific resources to help new students feel more at ease in their new surroundings.
Speaking to newly transferred students at school has revealed that it's not just them struggling to fit into the new environment, it's also them missing the old — familiar spaces, and estranged friends.
Reema Shanta recommends that parents help their children feel better by keeping their old friendships alive. They can do this by arranging playdates and get-togethers so that their child is reassured that they are not losing old friends, only gaining new ones.
If your child has a special morning routine, it may be wise to stick to it. Keep their old workstation to come back home to, and do not rotate their responsibilities and chores around this time — nothing at home has to change simply because the school has. Routine and familiarity can be comforting and children should have that to turn to when everything else feels a little bit uncertain.
In the face of change, your child may want more of you. Be prepared to spend quality time with them. Some children gravitate towards their hobbies; allow them time to do what makes them feel calmer. This could be painting, playing instruments, or even participating in martial arts or sports. Parents can additionally support their children by being open to questions from them without being judgemental, and generally being a safe space where they can vent out their feelings.
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