You are done with the holud, the exchange of dalas, and the reception is finally over with the confetti settled, and now comes the real challenge—impressing your in-laws. For many newlyweds, this is where the actual game begins. You have to win them over, one smile, compliment, and well-timed cup of tea at a time. Simply keeping your distance from them is not enough.

Let me tell you something before you say, "I don't need their approval." You do! After all, impressing your in-laws is the secret sauce for making awkward family gatherings pleasurable.

The first few months: Walking on eggshells

The first thing to know is that the post-marriage honeymoon phase does not apply to your in-laws. If anything, it's an intense probation period. Every move you make will be silently noted, analysed, and possibly discussed over dinner when you are not around.

For women, this might mean navigating the kitchen politics like a pro. No, you don't have to whip up a seven-course meal, but offering to make tea without being asked is an easy win. Remember, your mother-in-law might say, "Tumi kheye nao, kichu korte hobe na," but if you take that literally, you are walking a fine line.

For men, this translates into showing up for those household chores you never thought twice about before. Fixing a lightbulb or running a quick errand for your father-in-law will earn you more points than you would expect. And if you're bad at DIY, at least show some enthusiasm while holding the ladder for someone else.

Mastering the art of small gestures

When it comes to impressing in-laws, the big things matter less than the small, consistent gestures. Women often underestimate how far a simple, "Your sari is very elegant," can go with their mother-in-law. Compliment her cooking? Jackpot. Ask for her secret khichuri recipe? You are practically the family favourite now.

Men, on the other hand, can score major points with dads by showing interest in whatever hobby they are into. Does your father-in-law like cricket? Brush up on the latest series. Does he love gardening? Offer to water the plants (even if you secretly drown half of them).

And don't forget about the siblings-in-law. They might not wield as much power as the parents but their approval is often the gateway to the entire family's heart. Share a joke, bring them a small gift, or—if you're bold—side with them in a harmless family debate.

Navigating the food minefield

In most Bangladeshi homes, food is considered sacrosanct and how you interact with it may make or break your relationship with your in-laws. Even if you feel like you could burst if your in-laws give you food, always take at least a modest bit. Refusing food might as well be a declaration of war.

Women, if you are expected to cook, aim for something simple but impressive—a perfectly round ruti can do wonders for your reputation. Men, do not underestimate the power of helping set the table or washing a few dishes. You will be hailed as a modern husband, and trust me, the praises will echo for weeks.

When you inevitably mess up

Despite your best efforts, you will make mistakes. Maybe you called your mother-in-law's beloved pickle "onek jhaal" (big mistake), or you forgot your father-in-law's morning tea. These moments are inevitable, but what matters is how you handle them.

Apologise quickly and sincerely. For women, a soft laugh and a "Next time ar hobe na" will work wonders. For men, an earnest effort to fix the mistake—like rushing to make a fresh pot of tea—will win you back some lost points.

Understanding the long game

Making an impression on your in-laws is a marathon, not a sprint. One big gesture will not be enough to impress them, so you cannot stop there. It's about gradually establishing rapport and trust.

Sometimes you will think you are trying too hard but keep in mind that perfection is not the goal. It's about demonstrating your concern enough to make an effort. The payoff? A harmonious family dynamic and the ability to attend family functions without dreading every interaction.

Let's face it, a well-fed, happy mother-in-law and a father-in-law who thinks you're "one of the good ones" is worth its weight in gold. So, take a deep breath, grab that tray of cha, and go win them over—one gesture at a time.