My Small Thin Deshi Wedding

The era of big fat weddings is finally coming to a close. The millennials are facing the brunt of rising living costs whilst economic stagnation, a dependency on debt and being priced out of attaining quality education have all led to the demise of the grand wedding schemes. While the effects are still to firmly take a foothold in the Bangladeshi market, it will not be long before disdain replaces delight at the idea of an extravagant wedding. What is the point of spending over 20 lakhs feeding the same bunch of people you hardly meet over a period of three or four days? Budget Weddings are coming back in but that is not the only thing that is changing. 

EVENTS AND NUMBERS

The number of events each wedding is expected to have has also become curtailed. To ease the financial burden, the groom and bride are now opting for combined events with limited guests. Instead of having four events separately, now there are only two. Apart from cost savings, less number of events also means a lesser burden on your guests. Showing up to someone's wedding is important but showing up to every festival is quite the work.

Starting your married life in debt is fast becoming a ridiculous idea, yet traditional societal pressures still exist. Family members, brothers we lost at Kumbh Melas, the cousin of my chachi's in-laws' sister and everyone on your Facebook requires an invitation. Of course, your wedding guest list will always be greater than your Facebook friend list and the more the people, the more money you need to spend. And the biggest issue remains: the monetary expenditure. Your wedding can be kept a personal affair with only your closest loved ones invited. But remember, more guests may mean more gifts though ask yourself at what cost. If you missed anyone out and they really feel bad, then take them out to dinner some other time.

VENUES AND DECOR

Instead of venturing to hire venues that eat away more than 20 percent of the wedding budget, couples are exploring more adventurous options. Open air spaces, schools, fields and restaurants have all begun catering to these individuals at quite competitive prices.

Rooftops have once again become great places to host small ceremonies such as the Holud and Engagement while hotels too have begun offering much lower prices. Caterers are also allowing the options of highly customised menus.

Food is where a large chunk of the wedding money goes and this is one area where certain monopolies are beginning to break. Be wary of venues that parcel in their own caterer because what you save on the venue, you may invariably spend on the package menu.

Renting out open spaces or areas near water bodies offers the chance of decorating to your heart's content. The money you save on venue can be used for hiring an excellent event decorator. Gone are the days of solely flowers and the typical stage. Now weddings are bolder and more out there than ever before. A small wedding can even be themed. Just because its small does not mean it cannot be loud.

Model: Azra Mahmood, Nahid, Wardrobe For Nahid: O2, Wardrobe For Azra: Personal, Jewellery: New Jarwa House

GIFTS AND GOLD

Another area of expenditure is the gifts for your bride, groom, in-laws etc. A trend had developed of getting the best Indian designer clothes to go along with the Bollywood music tracks. The weddings themselves where often inspired by the billion-dollar wedding industry in India which fed directly into Indian TV channels, ever so popular here. However, now people are paying more attention to the local, yet equally good, 'deshi' fashion houses.

Local fashion entrepreneurs can also be consulted and you can actually recreate whatever you see with your own touches on a much lower budget. By planning ahead, you can go shopping for fabrics early on and even lower the prices further. The suit you make at a high end store can set you back around Tk30,000-50,000 while making the same suit from Ramna Bhaban, with the same cuts, will set you back almost less than half of that. 

The real point should be that there must absolutely be no stigma attached to a practical wedding. Your wedding may be the biggest day of your life but it is still only going to be a day. Your first born, your first medical emergency, your first house, your first car, etc. will all be days of much greater importance. Most of us are devoid of trust funds and million-dollar worth sugar daddies. For such people, your excitement for your wedding diminishes at the prospect of the expense. Sounds cheap yes, but if you are not and refuse to be a slave for a thriving consumerist culture, cheap will be probably be one of the most polite adjectives this society will use for you.

Prudence and frugality are a concept lost but the explosion in the size of wedding over the past five years has surely stirred some doubts about why we do what we do. Many are thus chartering new territories yet unexplored and the result has been quite fantastic.