Once, I believed there was a crown on my head.

The heart was brimming with life and light

Brimming with boundless force to surpass any spread.

Among the crowd, I was always one

Always the one to judge you who sits alone

With my flying wings, I looked up at the sky

But looked down on your bone

Sculpted you as the unworthy one who lacks grace

Believed, you do not have what it takes.

On one moonlit night,

Life began to feed on my light.

With melting wings, I became a part of your shed

In the court, the judge's head turned

Blamed me with her eyes burned

Sitting inside my stomach, she said–

"You do not have what it takes."

Now I see why you are unseen.

Now I see why your voice is so lean

And smiles rarely sheen.

Now I see why you sit alone

Pretending to be busy with your phone.

Now I see why you arrive late

And depart all too soon.

Now I see why you gaze out the window with a sigh,

Why your eyes seek solace in the sky.

Now I see,

Now the retired judge can see, before her depart

Not everyone looks at the sky with the same weighted heart.

I cannot amend the past, nor can I throw it away

But now I see,

It is okay not to feel okay.

Shaila Ferzana is currently studying in the Department of English at Jahangirnagar University.