Satireday
Satire / BBA student gets married, calls it the best networking experience of his life
Nothing is impossible – if you believe in your ability to make the right connections, that is.
Satire / iPhone 16 users claim biggest feature is a scam
The iPhone 16 series launched a couple of weeks ago, coinciding with a sudden rise in online ads by people selling human kidneys.
Government losing ‘Aandar’ control trying to bring it under control
In an unprecedented twist, the government keeps losing Aandar control while attempting to bring it under control. Aanda, or egg -- whatever people choose to call it doesn’t matter anymore as they are having breakfast without eggs.
Holy League unveils new leftist wing
“We represent the thoughts, feelings and experiences of the majority of Bangladesh. Our policies, philosophies and ideals are all BLESSED. You must understand this,” he yelled at the crowd.
A tale from the future: Ordinary students celebrate lynching 100th person
The year is 2028. Ordinary students have done something extraordinary yet again. Yesterday, they organised “Lunch for Lynching” to celebrate beating a hundred people to death since the “lucky seventh independence”.
Satire / ‘Natok Kom Koro Pio’
“Natok kom koro Pio,” the man said, his white beard shaking with fury.
Altruistic prisoners demand work-from-jail permission
When the world is busy inventing and discovering new things, the people of Chapasthan 2.0 are busy coming up with new demands with every passing hour.
Satire / Nation struggles with newfound freedom of speech
Who would have thought? From the yoke of authoritarianism, where everything you said had to be checked for the presence of words that could anger the powers that be, today, Bangladeshis can say whatever they want to.
Obsessed with rainbows, ex-faculty member slapped with restraining order
When the former part-time lecturer of Crack University was let go last year for his discriminatory language and actions, he was at a loss. Why had the university dismissed him for tearing up a book as an educator?
The Cancelling
The TV hummed slowly, filling the room with a soothing sound. Almost acting like a form of white noise.
Tyrant wakes up after 15 years, becomes good person
A tyrant who was on a drip of liquefied sleeping pills for the last 15 years because another tyrant had usurped him, woke up on August 7 and became a good person.
Husband keeps making excuses to get on expressway, wife fed up
A wife in the capital has become exasperated following the opening of the elevated expressway as her husband refuses to take any other road, even though the expressway doesn’t yet serve the areas where they live or work.
Structure thought to be incomplete bridge was a completed shade all along
Ten years ago, construction of a bridge started over a fully functional road in the Kauwwasaki upazila of Bangladesh costing the people a hefty Tk 55 lakh. It stopped midway causing massive confusion, consternation and other difficult words to pop across the minds of IELTS students of that area.
Management realises after 15 years employee does not do anything
The management of a biscuit factory learned yesterday that an employee who has been working at the head office for the last 15 years has actually done nothing all that time.
My time on the sidewalk
The Sun shines, a relentless yellow, My watch strikes 8:04am, The little window to escape wasting away For eternity or till 10:20am,
Cities that looked like Europe from the sky now looking like the Pacific
Once one of the greatest actors of our galaxy compared the cities of Chapasthan with those of Europe. He was so overawed by the celestial appearance of his country’s cities that he could not resist rating European cities lower.
Management trainee embraces ‘ownership mindset’, takes home office equipment
Police have raided his house for the equipment but none was found. The police, unsure what to do next, arrested him anyway, because why not!
Panic ensues as woman swings from coconut tree
In a rare sighting, a woman was found swinging from a coconut tree by clutching onto one of its leaves in Dhaka’s Elephant Road area on Saturday morning, creating severe panic among residents of the capital.
The story behind Trump’s ‘perfect’ mugshot
Former US president Donald J Trump, also someone who “they say” is the current US president, has been honing his “mugshot face” since January 6, 2021 -- the day on which he allegedly instigated an insurrection.
Comment Warrior Association in disbelief after India’s lunar triumph
The netizens of Bangladesh, the epicenter of social media-based intellectuals, stormed the internet once again following India’s historical astronomical leap.
Youth forced to start eating healthy as soft drink prices cross Tk 100
Earlier with the price hike of potato chips, inflation dawned upon the youth of Bangladesh for the first time. But our young generation somehow recovered from that inflation and continued to devour packaged food like the very concept of cholesterol doesn’t exist. However, as the price of 1-litre soft drinks has finally hit the sweet spot of 100 bucks, our youth is going through their worst crisis to date -- having to live without soft drinks.