Satireday
Satire / BBA student gets married, calls it the best networking experience of his life
Nothing is impossible – if you believe in your ability to make the right connections, that is.
Satire / iPhone 16 users claim biggest feature is a scam
The iPhone 16 series launched a couple of weeks ago, coinciding with a sudden rise in online ads by people selling human kidneys.
Government losing ‘Aandar’ control trying to bring it under control
In an unprecedented twist, the government keeps losing Aandar control while attempting to bring it under control. Aanda, or egg -- whatever people choose to call it doesn’t matter anymore as they are having breakfast without eggs.
Holy League unveils new leftist wing
“We represent the thoughts, feelings and experiences of the majority of Bangladesh. Our policies, philosophies and ideals are all BLESSED. You must understand this,” he yelled at the crowd.
A tale from the future: Ordinary students celebrate lynching 100th person
The year is 2028. Ordinary students have done something extraordinary yet again. Yesterday, they organised “Lunch for Lynching” to celebrate beating a hundred people to death since the “lucky seventh independence”.
Satire / ‘Natok Kom Koro Pio’
“Natok kom koro Pio,” the man said, his white beard shaking with fury.
Altruistic prisoners demand work-from-jail permission
When the world is busy inventing and discovering new things, the people of Chapasthan 2.0 are busy coming up with new demands with every passing hour.
Satire / Nation struggles with newfound freedom of speech
Who would have thought? From the yoke of authoritarianism, where everything you said had to be checked for the presence of words that could anger the powers that be, today, Bangladeshis can say whatever they want to.
Obsessed with rainbows, ex-faculty member slapped with restraining order
When the former part-time lecturer of Crack University was let go last year for his discriminatory language and actions, he was at a loss. Why had the university dismissed him for tearing up a book as an educator?
The Cancelling
The TV hummed slowly, filling the room with a soothing sound. Almost acting like a form of white noise.
Tyrant wakes up after 15 years, becomes good person
A tyrant who was on a drip of liquefied sleeping pills for the last 15 years because another tyrant had usurped him, woke up on August 7 and became a good person.
Satireday editor’s note
We understand that carrying two pieces on the same topic -- ChatGPT -- may not seem to be the most creative path to take.
Virginia man applies to court to marry ChatGPT
A law professor in Virginia yesterday applied to the lower court in the region seeking permission to marry ChatGPT.
Science can’t answer why people get the most important calls inside elevators
Science has been the prime source for answers ever since humans learned to remain silent about questions they couldn’t answer. However, with one particular question, “why people get the most important calls while they are inside elevators?”, science can only respond with silence time and again.
Man at deadbeat job surprised ChatGPT can replace him
After a career built entirely off of copying search results from Google, Tanvir Alam Khan, 28, a BBA graduate from Not South University, thinks that the human species should be compensated for artificial intelligence software disrupting the labour market.
New Fast and Furious movie to feature Bangladeshi highway buses
Finally, the recklessness in the Bangladeshi highway system is getting recognised.
Satire Show: Railway’s whole life is a loss
Panchagarh has five trains, but hundreds in Narayangaj don’t have the trains they need. Why? Is it because it is the Railway Minister’s district? One-third of the trains are inoperative, and the railway incurs losses every year. Carew gives a service, and makes a profit too, why can’t rail?
City residents blast ‘Buk ta faitta jaay’ amid political clash
Political clashes ahead of elections is not new for Paltown residents. Sometimes law enforcers, in their attempt to do “crowd control” take part in the fray.
APL’s fun has no bounds
The advent of the T20 format and the corresponding boom of franchise-based leagues across the world has kept fans entertained, but no other tournament has provided what country’s Alternate Premier League (APL) brought to the table.
99% of Bangladeshis could get ‘exposed’ before the end of 2023: researchers
Bangladesh holds the record for having the highest number of people, per square kilometre, to have been exposed on social media at least once in their lives.
Chuadanga man hospitalised due to malfunctioning weather app
A man in Chuadanga was hospitalised with pneumonia on Thursday because he kept walking around the district town in a sleeveless shirt and shorts even as the mercury had dipped to below 7 degrees Celsius, the lowest recorded temperature this season.